Page 109 of Not That Ridiculous

Nowhere.

Phil went nowhere. Kevin didn’t let go.

The doorbell jangled.

Phil looked over with interest. With his poor vision he couldn’tseeDougal, because he couldn’t see much of anything, but he must have scented his small conqueror’s approach in the air. He hunched his shoulders and dropped his head. The tip of his tail pattered desperately on the floor.

“Kevin, let go. Let me have him,” Jasper said, tugging the lead.

“No.”

“Kevin,” I hissed. “Take Phil into the kitchen or Dougal’s going to lose his shit.”

Kevin looked at me and squinted. “Little Dougal Hughes?”

“Yes. Go. Please!”

“Okay, okay.” Kevin hustled Phil around the end of the counter and into the kitchen. I hurried after him, surprising Pippa.

“Pippa, could you handle any customers, please?” I asked.

She was frowning at Phil. “He’s not supposed to be in the kitchen, is he?” she said.

“No, not really. It’s fine. We’re passing through. Can you…?”

“Don’t worry, Charlie,” Jasper called. “I’ve got this! My time to shine!”

The bean grinder switched on.

Pippa lunged around me and ran out to the front.

Kevin was staring at me in befuddlement even as he soothingly cupped the side of Phil’s head. Phil was trying to meld with his thigh. “Does he not get on with Dougal?”

“Uh, no. Dougal kicked his arse.”

“Dougal Hughes from the bookshop? Mrs Hughes’ old terrier?”

“That’s him.”

“He’s so cute. And old. Like…he’s soold.”

“He takes his territory very seriously. I brought Phil with me to work once when I first had him. Once was enough.”

Kevin narrowed his eyes. “This is Phil’s territory.”

“Not to Dougal. He’s thirteen or fourteen now, and he’s been coming here since he was a puppy. He and Mrs Hughes are regulars.”

Kevin wasn’t happy. “It’s stillPhil’sterritory, though.”

“Phil doesn’t mind.”

“Phil should mind. It’shis.” Kevin shifted from one foot to the other.

“I don’t think he’s interested in going out there to assert his dominance.”

Kevin stepped into me, his body a long line of heat. Phil also stepped into me, because he was glued to Kevin. “I would.”

“Uh—”

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