Page 56 of Not That Ridiculous

Bollocks.

Kevin worked himself to some sort of crescendo, then dropped the ropes like they were hot and stood back, visibly breathing hard as he accepted the congratulations of his buddies, who jostled amongst themselves to be next. He shook his arms out and grabbed a bottle of water, tipped his head back, and squirted a stream right down his throat. He kept on squirting and swallowing without even taking a break to close his mouth.

My eyes widened.

“If we get on and do your squats,” Jasper said, “we’ll be finished in time for you to make the ten o’clock beginners’ class with Mel. She’s amazing.”

I pulled a face. “I didn’t mean get into it right now. Besides, I was thinking more me, a yoga mat on my sitting room floor, and YouTube.”

“Valid,” Jasper said. “If you can stop Phil climbing on top of you. But it might be worth getting an instructor to give you some pointers on alignment.”

“You do it, then,” I said, trailing after him over to the squat rack.

“All right,” he said amiably.

“I’m going to have to start paying you at some point, aren’t I?”

“Nah,” he said. “This is fun.”

Fun? Dragging my bitching, complaining arse to the gym and having to baby me through every single exercise, fun?

Jasper always was a little weirdo, I thought fondly.

“Thanks, Jasper,” I said.

He selected some weight plates and loaded the barbell. Before he let me have it, he demonstrated a squat and had me join him a couple of times, then he took hold of the barbell and busted out a few reps to show me how it was done. His big thighs bunched and flexed as he worked up and down, effortlessly lifting the weight he had resting over his shoulders.

“Your turn,” he said.

All right. I could do this. No problem. I held out my hands for him to pass me the barbell.

He didn’t. He set it back on the rack, and passed me a bar.

“Uh,” I said. “The end bits are missing?”

“I want you to get your form right first before you try lifting.”

“I already showed you my form with the squats.”

“Now show me your form with a barbell.”

I hefted the bar over my shoulders and did a squat. “There. Can I have my weights now?”

“No. That was terrible. Do it again.”

I did it again.

“No, you’re doing it wrong.” Jasper stood in front of me. He did a quick squat. “Like this.”

I did one, straightened, and raised a brow.

“Okay, you need to see it from the side. Like this.” He turned and showed me from the side.

I did another one. “What?” I snapped when he didn’t tell me I was doing a good job. “What am I missing?”

“Okay, what’s happening is, you’re bending and straightening.”

“Definition of a squat,” I said promptly.

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