Page 70 of Fake Date with the Mountain Man

The rest of the office is starting to filter in for happy hour. A couple of guys from the fire crew have taken my place at the booth with Jack and Emmett. Vickie and Linda are at a table nearby. A few others are filtering in the door.

As easy as it would be to sneak out and as desperate as I am to leave, I feel guilty ditching Emmett. When I come back to the table empty-handed, Emmett looks confused.

“I couldn’t get the bartender’s attention,” I say a little too quickly.

Emmett gives me his best ‘I’m sure that isn’t true’ look and Jack slides out of the booth.

“I got it,” he says. Jack would make any excuse to extract himself from the growing group of people. He’d probably rather be swarmed by bees than humans.

A few minutes later, he returns with two beers for himself and Emmett. He sets a fluorescent green drink with a salt rim down in front of me.

“Forgot to ask what you wanted. Margarita okay?” he says sheepishly.

I nod and thank him. More tequila wouldn’t have been my first choice, but it beats taking shots. I make myself a deal: I canmake up an excuse and leave once this margarita is finished. It takes all of my perseverance to see my own deal through. My heart is racing, and my brain is consumed by the conversation just overheard. I replay it again and again until a loud gurgle of air hits my straw, and everyone is staring at me. That’s my cue.

“Sorry,” I say quietly as the conversation resumes all around me.

Emmett taps a knuckle to my glass, which hasn’t even had a chance to produce any condensation yet. “You downed that pretty quick,” he says. “Everything alright?”

“I’m just not feeling that great,” I say. It’s only sort of a lie because I do feel physically ill over the idea that Ryan might be seeing someone else behind my back.

“Well, most people wouldn’t feel too great if they downed an entire cocktail in two minutes flat,” Emmett laughs.

“Yeah, that’s probably it. I should head home and lie down.”

“Want me to walk you?” he offers.

“No, I live pretty close. Thanks for the offer though.”

I leave without proper goodbyes to anyone else.

The walk home passes in a blur. I’m so caught up in my own thoughts that I barely notice anything around me. When I arrive at the bakery door, it’s a true ‘How did I get here?’ moment. But there’s no time to think about that. All I can think about are the six little words that floated so easily out of that woman’s mouth: ‘Ryan and I are back together.’

They burn through me way worse than the tequila, coiling through my insides until I feel seared and raw.

I try my best to look at it from every angle. I try to consider that the woman might be lying. But why? Why would this perfect stranger lie about that right in front of me? It was pretty clear from the lack of recognition on her face that she doesn’t have any clue that I’m dating Ryan. And that’s probably for good reason.

I feel so blind and stupid. How could I possibly think that Ryan would change? How could I believe that things would be any different with me than they were with all the other women?

The worst part of it all is that I can’t talk to Ryan about it right now. My ‘Thinking about you. Hope you’re okay.’ text from a few hours ago is still unread, meaning that he’s definitely still dealing with the unfortunate situation out in the woods. The last thing he needs when he gets home is an irate girlfriend throwing around accusations. But this isn’t a conversation that I postpone for long.

As I lie in bed thinking it over, replaying the scene again and again, there’s so much that doesn’t make any sense. Between work and hanging out, Ryan and I are together most of the time. When would he have possibly had time for another woman?

She did say that they just got back together, I remember.

But when were they together in the first place? He’s never mentioned her. Abby has never mentioned her or any serious girlfriend of Ryan’s apart from Blair. Hunter is good friends with Ryan; surely, they all would have hung out if he dated this woman in the past.

I consider texting Abby but it’s getting late, and I know she’s been exhausted lately. She’s told me a hundred times that she wishes she could just sleep through the rest of this pregnancy.

Then I start thinking about Kayla, wondering if I should have been more scrupulous about that situation, wondering if Ryan and her actually had something going on and I was just too trusting.

Trust.

The word stands out as all the others fall away. It all comes down to trust and the simple truth is that, even after everything, I still don’t trust Ryan not to break my heart.

Chapter 26

RYAN

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