Page 25 of Locking Down Qetesh

"Oh, Jacob."

"It's okay. I ended it with her once I realised it was never going to change. But it's made me wary of dating. One of my other exes was also ace, and things were easier on that front."

"But on others?"

"We weren't compatible. He wanted a family, and I definitely wasn't ready for that. I'm still not sure that I am. But that was the end of the relationship."

"That's hard."

"Yeah. It was after the last relationship that I started wearing the ring on my right hand. I figured that I could be open to dating, while not pursuing it, but the ring might help with knowing who could be trusted to respect my sexuality." From the movement of his arms in the dark, I had to assume he was touching the finger where his ace ring would go.

"Does it work?"

"Good question. You're one of the few people who has known what it is."

"I have one of my own," I whispered. "I've never worn it outside the house."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm supposed to be a sex goddess. Or the goddess of sacred ecstacy, whatever that means."

"I have to assume orgasms."

I laughed despite myself. "I guess I do give good orgasms. But it's not related to my magic, kind of. Being a goddess is complicated."

"It sounds like it."

"I feel like I can't really talk about how I feel about sex because people don't understand. Most of the other love gods seem to adore sex."

"Have you ever asked them about their opinions?"

"No," I responded.

"Then you can't really assume to know what they think," he pointed out. "If you've not told any of them about how you feel, then it would seem reasonable to assume that some of them feel the same. Maybe even Aine."

"Aine isn't ace," I said firmly. "But I concede to the rest of your point. And it's not that I don't like sex. I feel like you do. It can be fun, but I don't want to be surprised by it. The thing is, that's not what people expect from a goddess like me. I've not really had many relationships, and they've been spaced out over the decades. And it's been a while since I had sex with anyone at all. It's just easier not to."

"What's a while to an immortal?"

I frowned and stared at the ceiling while I tried to work it out. "I'm not sure. Five years or so? I don't really count. What about for you?"

"About two, I think."

I nodded, even though he couldn't see it. "If you were with someone else who was ace and sex positive, would you have sex with them?"

"Asking for yourself?" he joked.

I cleared my throat. "I guess I'm just asking because I haven't had many chances to actually talk to other people who feel the same way I do."

"I'm just teasing," he responded. "If they wanted to, then I'd be up for it, just as something fun we could do together. But I don't imagine it would be often."

"No, I don't think I'd want that either," I said softly. "It is nice to talk to someone who understands that."

"I suppose now could be a good time to ask you on a date, then."

I froze. "A date?"

"Dinner, maybe. Or a movie if you prefer, though there won't be any making out in the back row if we do that, I actually want to watch the movie."

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