“Umm, I couldn’t really hear it all,” I pause trying to gauge how he is feeling. I can’t, his face is emotionless. I don’t know if he is happy, mad, or angry. Maybe all of the above?
“How do you feel about your parents not telling you?”
He turns his back to his bed and he falls on it. I know we haven’t had the most straightforward relationship over the last year and after what happened with Dalton I’m not so sure I can trust my gut anymore.
I trust my intuition and it’s telling me Byron was worth opening my heart to. He may have not been as gentle with it as I would have liked, but he always handled it with care. Maybe it’s what happened with Dalton, or simply maturing, but I’ve realized that I didn’t leave Byron the most straightforward directions on how to handle my heart. I’ve always struggled with the fact that some people simply want to be there for me because they care about me. Not who they expect me to be.
Byron has only ever wanted me to be authentic and now I want to be there for him.
I give into his magnetic pull and somehow end up snuggled into Byron’s side with my head resting on his chest.
“They seem genuinely happy. That’s all I’ve ever wanted for my mom, but how does she trust him after everything he has put us through?”
Byron’s grip tightens on my hip. The honking horns and sirens that flood the Brooklyn streets outside suddenly go quiet and it’s just the two of us in our own world.
“I’m not sure. I can tell you that sometimes people realize they were wrong and that they deserve that second chance.”
It’s a loaded answer and not just about his parents’ relationship.
“Yeah maybe. I told them I’d meet them before we leave to go back to school and that we have to get to Ivy and Jalen’s to help set up for tomorrow.”
We slowly unravel from each other’s grip. I soak in how familiar it feels.
The moment we get to Jalen and Ivy’s apartment, she sends theboys out with a to-do list that is a mile long. I’m happy Byron’s mom offered to keep Mia at her place.
“Isn’t your fiance rich? Why don’t you have people doing this for you,” I tease.
“My mom would be so disappointed if she found out I couldn’t host a party.”
Ivy lost both her parents when she was eight, and I respect that she has always tried to keep the spirit of what they taught her alive. I had to poke fun at the fact that Jalen is making literal millions of dollars, and she is stressing herself out.
“Plus, I promised Coach Hale we would have homemade pizza as an appetizer, and I honestly would rather bite my tongue every time I eat than disappoint that man.”
I stare at my friend, both very proud and a little sad that she made herself a life of her own here in New York.
“Is Coach Hale on the Ranger’s staff?”
Ivy’s eyebrows pinch. “You haven’t heard about Coach Hale? He is the director of the hockey program where the guys met. He’s the best. He’s kind of been like a father figure to me since I moved here.”
“No he’s never mentioned it.” But I want to know all about it.
It’s like I’ve finally put the last piece of the puzzle together, and the picture is finally clear. I want to be with Byron. I pushed him away because I was scared. He makes me feel comfortable enough to be myself, the true Lola Adams.
Yeah, I’ve shown her in bits and pieces, but Byron was the only person to know how badly I wanted to pursue culinary school. That finding a way to have a healthy relationship with my parents would be my greatest accomplishment. Because of that strained relationship, I often wonder if I’m worthy of that one great love.
To that Byron’s actions have spoken for him.I’ve never met anyone more worthy.
29
Byron
The relief that came over me when Ivy threw Jalen and me a list of errands that would have us running all over Manhattan was second to none.
The first thing on our to-do list was to pick up some pizza dough. Surrounded by eighty floor skyscrapers and New Yorkers rushing like they are the only people with somewhere to go, I lock my eyes on the cracks in the sidewalk. Let’s be honest. I don’t need any more bad luck.
I had one conversation about what happened at my mom’s with Jalen and it went like this:
So, when Lola and I got to the apartment today to surprise my mom, she was cuddled on the couch with my dad.