Page 9 of Silent Verity

“I never thought…” My voice trailed off, and I found myself recounting so many moments together, trying to see if I’d missed anything, but I hadn’t. It literally just seemed like I was a safe place for him. What the hell were they seeing that I wasn’t? Was I just fucking blind?

“We usually don’t see what’s right in front of us,” Spike said with a shrug. “But I’m pretty sure Jesse at least likes you as more than a friend, Dalton. Especially given the way he is now after you two had to fake a relationship for the cameras and you seem so chill about it.”

“No one knows how torturous that is more than me and Tor,” Salem said. Then, like a fucking lightbulb went off in his head, he groaned and dropped his head back on the couch. “That’s why he’s mad at me,” Salem muttered.

I snorted, then my eyes widened. I lurched forward. “Oh, my fucking God. You think Jesse is upset because he does like me and wants me that way and it hurt him to think I was willing to fake a relationship with him for our fans but not actually be with him that way?”

“Goddamn—two epiphanies at one time,” Kalin muttered.

I gave him the middle finger, but my eyes remained locked on Salem. “Am I right, Salem?”

Salem nodded and heaved a sigh. “Yep.” He pushed off the couch. “Now, while you try to sort out your drama with Jesse, I’ve got to figure out a way to grovel to Tor.”

Spike smirked. “Good luck. I hope he makes you work for his forgiveness.”

Salem gave him two stiff middle fingers on his way out of the living room.

“What the fuck do I do now?” I asked, looking to Kalin and Spike for help.

Spike shrugged. “You know Jesse the best, Dalton. He hasn’t changed since we moved. He’s just stuck in a constant state of depression and self-loathing. Only you know how to deal with him when he’s like this.”

He was right. I did. And what Jesse needed was love, adoration, and someone to take care of him. Who fucking better to do that than me?

8

Jesse

I stared up at my ceiling, my heart in my throat. Dalton had seemed just fine on the way home. As if that photoshoot hadn’t bothered him in the slightest. And I guessed there was no real reason for it to. It wasn’t like he actually liked me as more than a friend. He didn’t need me the same way I needed him. He’d gone out of his way yesterday to comfort me because it was what he’d always done when my mother called and upended my emotional stability. There had been nothing more to it than that, and I’d been a fool to see it as anything more.

And while that morning he’d promised me we could crawl back into his bed and binge watch some more TV while cuddling, I couldn’t bring myself to take him up on it again, even if I knew it’d make me feel better for a little while. I couldn’t keep doing this to myself. I couldn’t keep hoping for more every time he so much as looked at me.

How the fuck had Tor and Salem done this for over a fucking year?

A light knock sounded on my door. Sighing and hoping it wasn’t Dalton because I just couldn’t deal with him right then, I called out, “Come in.”

The door opened, revealing Tor, and I relaxed a little at the sight of him. I didn’t want to be bothered, but at least he wasn’t Dalton.

Tor was wearing a Sleep Token t-shirt with a pair of black skinny jeans, his feet bare. He took one look at me and sighed, shaking his head as he stepped further into my room. After shutting the door behind him, he crawled onto the bed with me and rested his head on my shoulder.

“It’s okay to cry,” he said quietly.

I blew out a harsh breath, my throat too tight for comfort. “Cry for what?” I muttered. “A man who doesn’t fucking want me? A man who never gave me any inkling that he had feelings for me, yet I pined after him anyway?”

Tor grabbed my hand in his and laced our fingers together. My throat tightened even more, damn near strangling me. “Salem likes me to keep my nose to myself because, in his opinion, what everyone else is going through is not our business. But you and Dalton are our best friends, Jesse, and it breaks my heart to see you two hurting.”

I scoffed, shaking my head. “Dalton isn’t hurting over a mother fucking thing.”

“You’re wrong, you know?” Tor quietly said. I swallowed thickly. “He’s in the living room right now stressing the fuck out because he doesn’t know what’s wrong with you. He doesn’t know how to help you. You’re shutting him out, Jesse. Hell, you’re shutting all of us out.”

“I’m not shutting you out,” I muttered, my voice petulant.

Tor snorted. “Only because I’m invading your space and forcing you to welcome me in.” I grunted because he wasn’t wrong. “Had I not come to you, you’d continue laying here wallowing in misery just like I used to. Just like Salem did.” He blew out a soft breath. “You know what I wish, Jesse?”

“What?” I grumbled.

“I wish someone had stepped in a lot sooner and forced me and Salem to work our shit out. I wish someone had come to talk to us. Did you know I wanted to fucking die, Jesse?” I swallowed thickly. Tor had gone on a downward spiral, but I’d had no idea his thoughts had turned suicidal. “Salem has always been my rock, and when I lost him, I fucking lost myself. I can’t help but see the parallels in you and Dalton.”

“Salem at least got you off in a nasty ass bar bathroom first,” I said quietly.

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