Page 100 of Interpreter

Oliver’s fingers move swiftly as he signs, letting me know that, if I think he’s going to take it easy on me just because I’m recovering, then I can think again. I laugh and notice the heads turn our way. I ignore them and keep signing,“I expect nothing less.”

We’re quiet for a moment, and then his face drops and the topic turns to something more serious. “What if it doesn’t work?”

I told him about my mother a couple of weeks ago. I wanted to be honest and up front about my path in this life. I want him to see me as brave and taking chances. No one has an easy life. My decisions were not about me losing my hearing. I see that now. They were about me losing my fight. Oliver needs to see that I may have been kicked down, but with the army of family and friends behind me, I got up. If we are doomed to lose, we will go down swinging. Even if this surgery fails, I will have tried all options. And no matter what, I will be happy with what hand I am dealt.

I squeeze his hand firmly and let go, signing,“Then at least I will know I tried. We are not handicapped because we have one less sense than others. Nothing is ever put on us that we can’t handle. If anything, we are the stronger ones. We are the fighters.”

His eyes well with unshed tears before I reach out and pull him to my chest. I won’t fail him. I won’t leave him if this surgery doesn’t help. He won’t go back to another foster family. This boy is mine. Nothing is changing. I’m not who I was before. I have all the reasons to fight now.

I’m pulling back, about to tell him that he has nothing to worry about, when I smell her. Alluring and exotic, I know Milah is standing behind us. Oliver smiles, his eyes still watery, but the little shit grins and signs,“He was getting emotional and needed a hug. You’re welcome.”This kid.

I turn and lock eyes with the woman who inspired all of this.

“Kids are such liars.”

Her bottom lip trembles, and her hands shake as she cradles my face in her hands. “I love you just the way you are. No matter what.”

I know she does, but that’s not why I finally decided to do this. I’m not doing this for her. I’m doing this for me. I’m doing this because I want the opportunity to hear my children call me dad. I want the opportunity to hear Milah cuss in her native accent. I want to hear Aspen call me Uncle Tim, and I’d like to be the judge of who sings Céline better. Milah or Felipe? This surgery is about me and my future. I’m the son of Penelope Lambros, a beautiful and talented woman and a great mother. I will learn from her mistakes, and I will cherish the beat-up recording of the last interview I have of her. I will hear again. And I will achieve all the dreams she had for us.

I wrap my fingers around Milah’s hands and bring one to my mouth.

“Iwantto do this.”

She nods, coming in for a hug and grabbing Oliver too. We stay like that for a minute until Dr. Callahan comes in and asks if I’m ready.

Milah pulls Oliver off the bed, holding his hand tightly. I look at my family huddled in this small space of a room, eyes glistening, with anxious hands. I take in everything in this moment, because no matter what happens in the operating room, nothing will change. I will still have this family when I wake up. I will still have an amazing girlfriend and one soon-to-be kick-ass son and another on the way. And, dammit, I swear on my life, nothing will change with me. I won’t let it. I won’t let them down.

I turn to Dr. Callahan and nod. “I’m ready.”

My family clears out, allowing the nurses to move the bed and wheel me down the hall. I wave at Oliver, and something changes in his face. Tears fall and he takes off in a sprint for me. The nurses stop and Milah takes off after him. I’m up, ready to meet him halfway, but he beats me, climbing back onto the bed. His face is red and he’s swiping tears angrily when he signs.

“No matter what, I will always hear you here.”He pulls my hand to his heart before letting go and signing again. “Promise me. Promise you’ll come back.”He jams that small finger into my chest, and I swear I’ve never loved someone as much as I love this kid.

I push him back by the shoulders so I can look at him.

“I promise.” I poke his little chest as he did mine.“Take care of Ms. Iglesias,”I sign, smiling at Milah as she rolls her eyes. “She thinks she’s tough, but she isn’t.”

Oliver looks back at Milah who smiles, opening her arms for him. He gives me one more stern look before he nods and walks back to Milah and Felipe. When Milah has her arms around him, the nurses start moving, and we’re rolling through the doors to the OR where my family can’t follow, and I sign to all of them,“I love you.”

The last thing I see before the bright lights of the OR hit me is all ten members of my family signing back. They love me. No matter what happens, I won’t disappoint them.

“Okay, Tim. Are you ready for the first day of the rest of your life?”

I’m prepped and strapped to the table, my nerves increasing by the second when I recognize a set of eyes that I’ve enjoyed annoying over the course of years.

“What are you doing in here, Phillip?”

Dr. Parker pulls down his face mask and flashes me a toothy smile. “You didn’t think I would miss this, did you?”

I laugh and direct my comment to Dr. Callahan. “You both get on my goddamned nerves,” I tell them, but my chest feels lighter knowing that a friend is at my side.

Dr. Parker puts his hand on my arm. “Let’s do this,” he says with a firm nod.

I look at both Dr. Parker and Dr. Callahan before I take a deep breath and exhale, “I’m ready.”

Six weeks later…

“Idon’t understand why he won’t let anyone go in there with him.”