Page 19 of Interpreter

I let my head bang against the adjacent wooden door. I can’t do this. I know I’ve already established this, but I feel like it needs to be reiterated. Dr. Parker was right. I haven’t moved on, and I don’t think now is the right time for me to start. Maybe he’s right. Maybe I do need more therapy or to write in that fucking journal he’s always talking about.

My lungs settle down with a few deep breaths as I slide down the wall.

Get your shit together, Tim. Dr. Parker gets paid to make you feel like you need him. You don’t. You built an army. You have friends. You are not alone.

But it feels that way.

My family, no matter how understanding they are, will never know what it feels like to be isolated in this way. To be embarrassed of how their voice is changing. Or how a piano prodigy with the world at his fingertips has become a hyperventilating teenager in the hall of an elementary school. They won’t understand what it’s like to feel the whispers and the pitied eyes of others. They won’t understand what it feels like to have it all and then have to scour rock bottom for whatever morsels life left for you. They won’t—my phone buzzes in my pocket. Unlocking the screen, I see I’ve missed a couple of texts.

Hayes: I heard your new boss is hot. ;) Sneak a pic. Not for me, but Mason could use a release. He’s been a cranky little bitch lately.

Mason: Fuck you, Hayes!

I grin knowing Anniston went straight home and filled them all in. Nosy bastards.

Tim: Ha! I’m glad you all have time to sit around and gab. Bitches.

Cade: So how’s it really going?

I think about Cade’s question for a moment. Should I tell him the truth that I just had a panic attack and ran away like a little kid?

Tim: I don’t think working here was such a great idea.

Cade: I’m sure it’s not that bad.

Cade, always positive and shit.

Mason: I told you kids were unreasonable.

That’s a little better.

Vic: Give it time.

Kane: No one is coming to get you. Suck it up.

Now that’s more like it. Kane, our resident Asshole Number Two, doesn’t give a single fuck if he hurts your feelings. He speaks the truth.

Cade: Kane! What he means is that Anniston asked that we all respect Dr. Parker’s orders and let you work through this. A new job is hard on everyone.

Theo: No, it isn’t, Cade. Not everyone is such a damn pussy. Fuck the teacher to pass the time, or a mom. No one said you actually need to work.

Kane: What’s a line leader do anyway?

Vic: He’s not a line leader. Stop telling people that, Theo!

Cade: Theo, are you seriously naked in the pool?

Mason: I’m out. I’ll be by to get you later, Lambros.

Hayes: Theo! You said you were too hungover to scout the Blakemore boy with me!

Theo: I am hungover, Hayes. I’m hung over this pool float, providing your commander with a much-needed attitude adjustment. Mind your business, boys, and let Daddy keep the peace around here.

Laughing and suddenly feeling a little better, I pocket my phone. Those ridiculous fucking texts couldn’t have come at a better time. My breathing is better and, well—a vibration tickles the muscles in my back. What the hell is that? Are they working on the building? I look around and see nothing out of the ordinary while the vibrations grow against the door. Once… twice…. It’s a pattern. I sit stock-still feeling the intervals of vibrations that carry the distinct pattern of Mozart’s Symphony No. 40 in G minor. I know that piece. I’ve played it a million times. My hands push flat against the wooden door, feeling. The vibrations grow stronger, and my fingers begin to tap out the rhythm. I don’t even realize the vibrations have stopped until my back hits the floor and I’m staring up at curious eyes nestled behind thick eye-glass lenses.

“I thought I heard someone out here,” the stranger that looks like a sitcom version of a grandma says. “Did you need me?”

I straighten and stand. “No, ma’am. I just….” What the fuck do I say here? I just needed to have a meltdown by your door, but it’s hilarious that karma sent me careening toward the fucking music room’s door to have said meltdown.

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