Page 26 of Subscriber Wars

And… his cameraman is about to witness a murder.

“I’ve learned that my neighbor is one misdemeanor away from being a serial thief,” I spit.

“And?” he prompts flatly, as if my comment did nothing to deter him.

“And one day I will see his face on one of those missing person boards when someone finally offs him for being a complete pain in the ass.”

He grins. “Oh, come on. Not a complete pain. I could only dream of being a complete pain in the ass. Right now, I think my status is one of a minor pain or just a twinge, but not a complete pain in the ass.”

“Sebastian!” I pop a hip and blow out a breath. “Give me my keys. I have places to be. I don’t have time for this shit.”

He rubs his jaw casually, as if he has all day to grate on my nerves. “All you have to do is tell me what you learned.”

It’s finally reached the point of loathing.

Sighing, I pray for patience and look up at the ceiling, before leveling him with a look. As bored as I can manage, I state the stupid facts that I’m impressed he spelled correctly when he wrote them. “There are two million burglaries a year which translates to a burglary once every thirteen seconds.” I roll my eyes. “Happy now?”

He pushes off the wall and leans into my personal space, forcing me to endure that organic smell of cedar. “Wrong. It was two point five million break-ins a year. And you, sweetheart, need to be more mindful of that. Just because Daddy pays for your posh little townhouse doesn’t mean your neighbors are decent.”

“Clearly,” I mutter. “Now, hand them over.”

When the smuggest grin emerges on his face, I know this little shitshow of torture isn’t over.

“I’ll offer you an exchange,” he says, his eyes dancing with delight. He loves torturing me.

I sigh. I’m not getting out of this. No matter what I say or do to him, he will continue to taunt me until he gets his way. “Your keys…” He dangles the words out as bait.

“I’m listening.”

“For my pillow and eight weeks of playing my girlfriend.”

I choke on a gasp.

“Are you high?”

“Sober as a nun.”

“Why the hell would I want to pretend to be your girlfriend? And why in the fresh hell would I subject myself to it for eight weeks, even if I was stupid enough to agree?”

Sebastian pulls his phone out between us and opens the MyView app.

“I don’t have time for this, Sebastian. Give me my keys and we can negotiate the pillow and chair later.” I add my chair to the mix because he’s giving that back, even if I have to pry it from his cold, dead hands. “I don’t need to be subjected to your MyView escapades.”

Really, I have been tortured enough the past couple of days.

I fold my arms and then I hear it. My voice. “What the hell are you watching?”

Sebastian holds the phone out of my reach and starts rattling off random comments. “Holy shit! They’re back! I’ve missed seeing their videos.”

I scrunch my face. “What video?” I wasn’t shooting a video at the party and neither was he. I’m not allowed since Drew and Fenn can’t seem to behave. Fenn is one more suspension away from expulsion from the baseball team. He doesn’t need any more bad publicity than he already has.

“Aww! He’s jealous! That’s so sweet. I want a man who gets pissed if I wear a bikini. OMG! Are they together? It looks like he was about to kick that guy’s ass! Swoon alert.”

I jump for his phone, and he holds it out of my reach and says, “Apparently, someone at the party shot this video of us and posted it. Now there’s a rumor floating around that we might be an item.” He grins. “Or at least a couple who are currently fighting.”

I pretend to gag, and he ignores me. “You don’t have to believe me. Just look at your subscribers. I got a thousand overnight.”

Don’t do it, Vee. It’s a trick, an elaborate prank, just so he can get back at you.

---