Page 103 of The Refiner

That night, Keys pulled out all the memories we had packed up from Piper’s house. She pulled out each card Piper kept. Each letter. Each note. She pulled them all out and she read them and cried. And the next morning, she asked Tatum to smile for Mama.

“Found it!”

Tatum’s shout clears the memory as I adjust my hold on Keagan and step back. “Let me see if you’re right.” I hold my hand out for the box, taking it and flipping it over in my hand. “Yep, good job, kiddo. You picked the right one.”

Tatum squeals as I kneel, opening the box and pulling out the cherry-flavored Ring Pop. “Give me your hand, Boho Princess.” I took over doing this for Keagan’s birthday after Piper died. Keagan said it was a tradition between her and Piper to celebrate their birthdays with crowns, candy necklaces, and Ring Pops. But since I wasn’t part of that tribe of birthday princesses, the least I could do was act like a prince and place the crown and ring. Though, when Tatum became big enough, she stole my glory, but not today. Today is a special birthday.

I slide the oversized ring onto Tatum’s little hand. “Now, you’re officially the Boho Princess.” It always amazes me what a little make-believe and love can do for these women in my life. If you treat them like princesses, they will treat you like a king. And that feeling of being loved and respected will never grow old. I always want to be their provider, their security, their comfort in good times and in bad.

I kiss Tatum’s forehead. “Now, hand me Mama’s ring.” Tatum eagerly dashes back to the bag and returns with a black box just like hers. This moment has been in the works for years. I started this tradition of black boxes with Ring Pops inside a couple of years ago. My reasoning was two-fold. Black boxes brought forth a memory of pain for me just like Ring Pops did for Keagan. We needed to remember that within pain dwells joy. We simply needed to learn to look deep enough. So we changed those memories into something more.

We made them a tradition—a reminder of a time that nearly broke us, and a time that brought us together. Ring Pops and black boxes no longer hold our happiness captive.

“Go, Mama.” Tatum nudges Keagan. “Let Daddy make you a Boho Queen.”

Keagan chuckles, but does what she’s told and steps in front of me. I take my time with Keagan, drawing out her coronation just a little longer. No matter what she told me on the phone, we weren’t skipping this birthday because she was busy. And I’m definitely not allowing her to work all night. Whether she finishes her project or not, she’s coming home to a house full of people for a surprise party. Keagan will never celebrate her birthday alone and not in the company of the people who love her. So, I let her think I agreed to her ridiculous offer of just doing a cake at lunch for her big day. It’s the only compromise I’ll make today.

“I think Daddy forgot how to open mine,” she says to Tatum, since I’ve yet to open her box.

“I didn’t forget.” I glance down at the black box in my hand. “I just wanted to remember what it looked like.”

The girls look at each other with confusion.

“Since I’ll never hold a ring like this again.”

Keagan sucks in a breath and takes a step back. “Astor, what are you doing?”

Lifting my gaze to hers, I admit, “I lied. I said we could raise Tatum together, but we can’t.”

A crunch goes through the room. Tatum decided this ring ceremony was taking far too long, and she needed to munch on her candy necklace to pass the time.

“That’s not enough for me anymore, Keys.”

Tears well in Keagan’s eyes when I crack open the box, revealing not a Ring Pop, but a two-karat yellow diamond. “You were wrong. You said this relationship could never work—that it wasn’t possible for love to be born from grief.”

I pull the ring from the box, pinching it between two fingers. “But it did. Our friendship might have started through grief, but our relationship was born from love and respect.” I lean forward and take her hand, pulling her closer. “Let us prove ourselves wrong again.”

I slip the ring on her finger. “Be my wife and prove our love can last a lifetime.”

Keagan’s hand shakes in mine, and I know what she’s thinking.

“I won’t leave you.”

She scoffs. “You don’t know that.”

Every day that has gone by, we’ve found love, purpose, and faith in each other. We don’t need to be afraid anymore.

“True.” I kiss the top of her hand. “But I’m willing to take the chance and spend every minute I can loving you.”

“She says yes!” Tatum finally swallowed the mouthful of candy and joined the conversation. “Say yes, Mommy, so we can have cake.”

I give Keagan a one-shoulder shrug. “You’re holding up the celebration.”

Slowly, a smile inches up her face. “I can’t believe you bought me a blood diamond.”

“They were fresh out of friendship rings, so I settled for a conflict-free diamond—yellow for your sunny disposition and boho attire.”

She pushes at my shoulder. “Smartass.”

---