Page 34 of The Refiner

I’m not the Keagan Kenny knew anymore.

Even walking down the hallway, not hearing the laughter from the nurses’ desk or my feet touching the floor, feels strange.

Some would say I’m numb.

But I disagree.

I’m empty.

My body. My heart. My soul. Is utterly empty.

Piper took it all when she drew her last breath.

I am truly alone.

It’s not the same as when my parents died.

I remember crying, but what I remember the most was my big sister pulling me close, rocking me back and forth, petting my hair, and promising me it wasn’t the last time we’d see our parents.

I believed her.

I let her promises settle around me, warming me with thoughts of hope and a brighter future. One that she shattered in a single breath, leaving me cold, empty, without a family. Now, her promises are giant balls of pain. How am I supposed to leave here? How am I supposed to go back home to my life of writing game content and barhopping with Kenny? How can I create a happy ending when I have no happiness to give?

Everything I was rested in her arms.

Piper was my human.

My best friend.

My family.

My entire heart.

And now, all those things have been ripped away. I wasn’t ready. All the days I spent by her side were merely a blink of an hour. I needed more time. I needed her to wake up and tell me what to do. I need to know how to go on when I have nothing left to live for.

“Ms. McKellan?”

I turn around and find a nurse standing outside the nursery door. “Is something wrong with Tatum?”

She’s quick to reassure me. “Everything is fine, but….”

Butis never a good word. “But what?” What in the world is wrong with my niece?

“We’re having a hard time consoling her. I thought maybe you or Dr. Potter would like to try some kangaroo care with her, that often helps settle down the newborns.”

“I don’t know what kangaroo care is, but I’ll get Astor.” This is his job now; he’ll be the one who needs to take care of her.

“We called him,” she says gently. “He said we should ask you.”

My eyebrows shoot up, and she hurries to explain. “I’m not sure what’s going on with him. Dr. Astor is the best when dealing with children, but he seems terrified of his daughter for some reason. He won’t even come close to her.”

Well, we can’t have that now, can we? I promised my sister that I would make sure Tatum is happy, and she can’t be happy if her daddy is a scaredy-cat.

“Show me what to do.”

I find him right where the nurses said he would be—in an empty hospital room on the couch, folded over his knees like a beautiful angel.

“Hey.”

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