Page 44 of The Refiner

Because I didn’t miss the tears she swiped away a few minutes ago. She shouldn’t be alone. And, unfortunately, apart from a newborn, I’m all she has left.

“Because I don’t like driving around with Tatum in the back seat during rush hour.”

I cock a brow, daring her to argue with me that the twenty minutes of traffic we just sat through is safe enough with the infant in the back. You never really think about how unsafe the road and the world are until you have a child in your back seat. My worries have changed in a matter of days. Traffic would usually only serve to annoy me. Now, it makes me feel like catastrophe is waiting, just outside my window, for the worst time to strike.

I catch Keagan glancing in the mirror. Like me, she doesn’t want Tatum in this car any longer than she has to be. “Whatever, but you’re taking me home. I’m not staying. Don’t even try to bribe me with more hints and promises about your secret.”

“Believe it or not, I’m not thrilled to let you in on my ‘secret,’” I counter. “I’d prefer to handle it alone, but I can’t. I need someone.”

She may say the hints won’t sway her, but they redirect her anger into curiosity. “Why not ask your brothers?”

“They don’t know.” Nor will they, if I have any control over it. “The deal was between me and your sister.” And I was going to back out of it as soon as I saw Piper again. But now, after everything that’s happened, I can’t.

“And now me—once you tell me, that is?”

“Correct, but I still need to make some calls and get Tatum settled first. Do you think you can be a little more patient? I promise, I’m not trying to keep you here longer than you want. I just need a little time to acclimate to being a new father and—”

“—making those calls. Yeah, I get it. Just know that my patience is much shorter than Piper’s. So don’t go thinking about trying to charm your way into my good graces, just because you picked out a great name for my niece.”

I raise my brows. “Is that a back-handed compliment I hear?”

“Don’t be cute. It won’t work on me. I’m immune to your charm.”

I can’t help the laugh that escapes me. It’s a welcome reprieve from all the pain. “Oh, so you think I’m charming too. And here I thought you hated me, Keys.”

She fights back a smile. “Hush, before I end up hurling in your car.”

It’s not confirmation that we’re friends, but it’s close.

Somewhere during the last fifteen miles of traffic, Keys fell asleep. I thought she would wake up when I pulled into the garage, but she didn’t. The girl sleeps like the dead.

So I take Tatum in first, setting her carrier down on the floor while I carry her insane aunt into the house wedding-style and into the guest bedroom, laying her gently on the mattress. Keagan’s eyes flutter open as she looks at me, leaning over her. “I can’t even be shitty to you right now, and that’s more upsetting than it should be.”

I grin, grabbing the throw blanket at the foot of the bed. “I’m calling that progress.”

“Don’t be a good guy, Astor.” She pinches her eyes shut. “It just makes my heart hurt worse.”

Pulling the blanket over her body, I kiss the crown of her head and whisper, “Sometimes, healing hurts worse than breaking.”

Keagan

It’s midnight, and Tatum is already about to be fatherless.

“You said you’d take me Piper’s”

Astor has the audacity to be lounging in his pajamas. His pajamas! Like he’s getting ready for bed and not getting ready to take my ass Piper’s like he promised.

“Good evening to you too. Would you like a drink to take that attitude down a notch?”

What would take my attitude down would be wringing his neck, but since that isn’t going to happen, I grab the drink from his hands and down it in one gulp. “Thanks, now, can we leave?”

Unbothered, he takes the glass back. “It’s midnight. Tatum is already asleep.”

“She’s a week old. She’s always asleep. That’s not an excuse to keep me prisoner.”

I’ve resorted to theatrics.

Sleeping in Astor’s guest bed wasn’t the worst thing I’ve experienced lately, but I’d like the time to scream and cry in private. Being here with him only distracts me from thinking about my sister. And I don’t want to forget her just yet. I don’t want her memory to fade like my parents’ memory.

---