Page 82 of The Refiner

But at this point, I don’t care. I would say I learned something for any future family deaths, but I don’t really need to worry about that now, do I? I never plan on doing this ever again.

My heart won’t be able to take it.

It likely won’t be able to take leaving Tatum and Astor when I have to return home and back to work, especially since learning about everything that transpired between Astor and Piper. We haven’t brought it up again since that night.

But we don’t need to.

I loved Astor before I knew everything that happened.

His infertility means nothing. To me, Astor is the same hot DILF as before—when he yelled at Archer for me, who has left me alone for the most part. Instead of calling, he’s been sending me project materials and requesting an approximate return-to-work date. I asked him for two more weeks. And as dickish as Archer has been, he granted me the extra time off—which I appreciate, since I know I’m out of bereavement and vacation time.

I know it’s only from Astor threatening him, but still. I’ve been able to get Piper’s home situated and spend time with my niece.

And fall in love with her father.

I wonder what Piper would say about this situation now that Astor has told me the truth. Would she give me shit for falling in love with the “asshole” from the baby shower or would she tell me to be careful, that long-distance relationships can be rough—especially for someone like me who already doesn’t trust men? Honestly, I don’t know. Everything just seems so complicated.

No matter what, to pursue an actual relationship, one of us will have to sacrifice something.

It should be me.

I have no ties to Fairfield other thanGameTalesand Kenny. I could easily pick up and move, since I don’t have a house or a booming medical practice to run.

But then I’d lose my promotion.

And the McKellan women have always put their careers first.

Until Piper chose Tatum.

She would have known her peers would talk when they found out she was carrying the child of her colleague, but she did it anyway. Piper sacrificed her reputation for her little girl.

I used to think nothing was worth sacrificing yourself for, but now, I’m not so sure.

A knock sounds at the front door, thankfully, interrupting my train of thought. I walk over and peer through the window, spotting a familiar set of blue eyes.

“Hi,” I say, pulling open the door. “I thought we weren’t meeting until tomorrow?” Astor asked if I needed help packing today and I told him no. Tatum had spent most of the night crying and he looked like he needed a day of naps.

“Something came up.” He shifts on his feet but doesn’t come in. “Can you watch Tatum today?”

“Sure. Where are you going?” I don’t even care that I’m being nosy. This man has thawed my heart; therefore, he’s forced to suffer the consequences of being with someone who’s curious like me.

“I called” is all he says.

“You called who?” Why is he being so secretive?

“Piper’s office.”

It takes me a second to put it together, to understand what he isn’t saying, but then it hits me. “You’re having the procedure. You’re fulfilling your promise to my sister.”

He nods slowly. “And to myself. If anyone has shown me the value of putting pride aside and going after what you want, it’s been you.”

What? Have I said anything to convince him to go through with the procedure? “I don’t understand.”

He sets Tatum in her carrier at my feet and presses a kiss to my lips. “You don’t need to understand. I’ll be back as soon as I can. They had a cancellation and Dr. Teller said they could move up my procedure.”

Procedure? “I didn’t know you had scheduled it yet.”

He swallows, as if this whole thing is uncomfortable for him to talk about. “A couple of days ago, when you watched Tatum.”

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