Page 49 of Tell Me Goodnight

“I don’t mind,” Devininsisted. “Especially if it makes things easier for you.”

“No, it’s fine.” Ishook my head, my heart hammering and my palms sweating. “It would be—” Myvoice cut short, coming to a screeching halt. It would be,what? Where was I going with that? It would be … wrong? Bad?

Or would it beperfect? A weekend away with the girls,and Tess … Almost like we were a …

Don’tsay it. Don’t eventhinkit.

“You there, man?”

I pinched my eyes shut,blocking my vision from Beth’s mournful gaze, and said, “She also takes care ofher grandmother. I don’t think she’d be able to.”

“Ah, gotcha,” Devinreplied. “Okay, well, you and your daughters come up here this weekend. Andhey, don’t worry about the money, man. I’ll take care of it,” he mentionedwithout me even bringing it up.

It hurt my pride toaccept a handout. I shook my head. “No, I can’t accept that,” I told him,although where I’d get the money otherwise, I wasn’t sure. Maybe I could ask myparents for a loan, or Jeff …

“Hey. Consider it abusiness trip, and your potential boss is footing the bill, all right?” He wasinsistent, and I sighed before reluctantly agreeing. “Cool. We’ll smooth outthe rest of the details over the next couple of days. You have my number. Shootme a text, okay?”

I told him Iwouldand we said our goodbyes. I changed out of my pajamasand into some clean clothes. I brushed my hair back and out of my face, and Idid it all without looking at Beth. Without seeing the imaginary pain hidden inher eyes. Pain caused by the knowledge that her husband, the man who vowed tobe faithful to her forever, was battling against feeling something for anotherwoman. The woman meant to be there for our children and nothing more.

Sucha selfish man, babe. You were wrong.

***

“Grandma,” Tess called feebly into thehouse as she pushed the door open.

The girls and Iremained hidden behind her back as we entered the house, scented with age andmemory. It was an old person’s home, there was no denying that. The mustinessmade me choke on an abrupt cough and Shelly turned to look up at me with shockwidening her eyes.

“Daddy, it—” I laid agentle hand over her mouth as I pressed my pointer finger to my lips in a silentshh.

“Grandma?” Tessshouted. I recognized that immediate jolt of panic as she hurried further intothe house, toward a kitchen, and then down a hall.

In her absence, I tooka moment to crouch in front of Shelly and Annabel. I painted my face with my mostserious expression and said, “Listen, ladies. Tess’s grandma is very old andsad, okay? We’re here to help Tess and cheer her up, if we can. But I need youguys to be on your absolute best behavior, okay? No talking back. No fighting.Okay? Can we do that?” They didn’t even hesitate before nodding, and I smiledas pride swelled in my chest. “I love you, girls, you know that?”

“I know,” Shellyreplied smugly. She grinned, until she spotted something beyond where I sat,and she took off.

“Shelly,” I hissed,until I saw where she’d gone. There was a cat on the recliner in the center ofthe room, and Shelly, a definite candidate for a future in crazy cat ladyhood,was now stroking her hand over its back.

I smiled, not thinkinganything of it, until I heard Tess hurry down the hallway. “She’s coming out.She was just taking a—oh, my God, Shelly!” She ran to the little girl, who’shand was frozen on the cat’s head. “Shelly, honey, Harriett isnota nice kitty. I’mactuallyconvincedshe might be evil. She doesn’t like …” Her voice trailed offas she took in the purring cat, eyes closed and content under the touch of mydaughter. Then, she looked over to me, outstretching a hand. “Jon, come overhere andyoupet her.”

I narrowed my eyes as Istood up. “Uh, I just watched you nearly have a coronary over the cat beingtouched, which tells me there’s a reason why. I don’t need any battle wounds,thanks.”

“No, no.” She walkedover to me and easily took my hand. I let her drag me over to the recliner,only because I was too stunned, too startled by the warmth of her fingersaround mine and the contentedness I felt in her grasp. “Here,” and she placed myhand on the cat’s back. “Pet her.”

Reluctantly, I strokedmy hand over the cat’s back, and … nothing but kindness. She purred obnoxiouslyand nuzzled her head into my palm when I made the move to scratch behind herears. My mouth lifted in a genuinely happy smile as I knelt beside the chairand Shelly, petting the tabby cat and listening to her motor run.

“Daddy, I want akitty,” Shelly whined, and I wrapped my other arm around her.

“Yeah, I know, honey.”She’d been begging for a cat since she knew what one was, but our apartmentcomplex wouldn’t allow pets. “Maybe one day.”

“This is such BS,” Tessuttered, completely flabbergasted, and when I turned to glare disapprovingly ather, she rolled her eyes. “They don’t know what that means, Jon. But seriously,this is ridiculous! Why doesn’t she like me?” Then, she knelt in front of thecat’s face and asked pitifully, “Why don’t you like me, Harriett, huh? Whynot?”

The cat replied with aspitting hiss. I couldn’t help but laugh. “Wow, you must’ve ticked her off.Maybe she’s traumatized.”

“Bywhat?”

“Well, youdidlet my kids watch a horror movie thefirst night you watched them,so…” Ichuckled at the jab as my eyes met hers.

She wasn’t laughingwith me. “Oh, shut up,” she said, but I didn’t miss the crystal sparklingwithin her eyes.

---