Page 12 of Let's Get Textual

Me: Trolls? As in the animated movie?

Zach: STOP JUDGING ME!

Me: There is no way I’ll ever not judge you now.

Zach: I’m so bored. Work is killing me today.

Me: I’m sitting in an accounting class. I win in our game of suckage.

Zach: Ouch. I bow to your bravery, my fair queen.

Me: …

Me: Did you just say that? Is your brain poisoned from all the video games? What type video games ARE you playing?

Me: Are you secretly twelve? Because I feel like that’s something a twelve-year-old would say.

Zach: Who in the world taught you how to socialize? Do you say the first thing that pops into your head? Are you deranged?

Me: My mother. Sometimes. Possibly.

Zach: You are incredibly exhausting.

Me: But still awesome.

Zach: And humble. We can’t forget that one.

Me: Check you out, having my back and all. BESTIES FOR LIFE.

Me: *whispers* But really…did you just say that? Are you still living in your parent’s basement?

Zach: Yes, I really said it. I might have fibbed about my video game playing. It’s frequent…obnoxiously so. I tend to play RPG games, but no, I don’t live in a basement. I work in one.

Me: Because that’s not still weird…

Zach: If it makes you feel any better, I own the basement I work in.

Me: Your street cred IS improving.

Zach: Oh thank god. I was worried you would never bug me ever again.

Me: Wish in one hand…

Zach: Aren’t you supposed to be paying attention in class?

Me: Yes. Now shut up.

Zach: *sends you a thousand cat pictures*

Me: Don’t threaten me with a good time.

Me: Cake, brownies, ice cream? GO!

Zach: Yes.

Me: NO! Pick one! HURRY!

Me: I’m at the store getting ready to check out and I NEED TO KNOW. I can’t decide. Help a cute, hangry girl out, would ya?

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