Page 13 of Let's Get Textual

Zach: How about…a brownie cake with ice cream.

Me: I think I just came.

Zach: I am known for my skills.

Me: Stop it. I’m in the middle of the damn grocery store. Save that talk for later. ;-)

Zach: Wait…really?

Me: OMG no. Pervert.

Zach: YOU STARTED IT.

Me: I need you to pick between CAKE, BROWNIES, and ICE CREAM.

Zach: Umm…brownies. With chocolate and vanilla ice cream on top. Chocolate sauce drizzled over it. And sprinkles.

Me: I hate you.

Me: DOWNLOAD ATTACHMENT

Me: I put it all in my cart.

Me: It will be your fault when I fall into a sugar coma.

Zach: You can thank me later.

Me: You promise to come to my funeral?

Zach: And recount all the marvelous memories we’ve had together, including where I gently pushed you to feast upon magical desserts. I’ll lean down to your casket and whisper, “You’re welcome.”

Me: BRB, dying.

Me: Entertain me, squire!

Me: Did I say that right?

Zach: Good enough for me.

Zach: Would you rather have 1,000 puppies who barked constantly or one who hated you and never let you pet it?

Me: What in the actual hell is wrong with you?!

Zach: You HAVE to pick. It’s the only rule of Would You Rather.

Me: I asked you to entertain me, not torture me.

Zach: Tick tock.

Me: FINE. One puppy who hated me. Even though it’s the saddest thing ever, I know I couldn’t stand the barking of a thousand adorable, fluffy puppies.

Zach: I think that would be a wise decision.

Me: More entertainment, stat. I love my roommate to death but she just put on the dumbest show ever.

Zach: Which show?

Me: Something about boys in trailer parks and propane.