Page 33 of Sin

Tonight, I refuse to cover myself in blankets and hide away my desire for Sin from myself. I want to feel it. Give in to it. Let it overtake me.

My clothes are too warm and constricting, so I pull them off and let them drop messily to the floor. The ceiling fan’s cool breeze on my hot skin almost feels like a touch. I close my eyes and let myself imagine that it is Sin’s hand lightly tracing over my ribcage and up my chest to my nipple, causing it to pucker. Needing more, I pinch it and let out a cry at the sweet pain.

My other hand goes to my cock, which is hard and leaking. I pretend that it’s Sin’s strong hand that wraps around my cock like a vice, and he begins to move up and down in fast, even strokes.

“Sin,” I call out his name, my nails grazing across my chest in little bursts of pain that intensify the pleasure. “More,” I plead to my imaginary lover.

As lost as I am to my bliss, a movement outside catches my eye. A movement of shadows. It has to be my imagination. No one else is home—except for Sin.

The realization should horrify me. It should stop the continually faster pace of my hand on my cock, but instead, it enflames me. The idea that he’s watching me makes me feel like he’s a partner in my pleasure. Wild at the idea, I get up on my knees and face the window, slowing the pace of my strokes because I don’t want this to end. I want him to get a full show.

The freedom of this feels almost as good as the pleasure racing through my body. Finally, just this once, letting him see my desire for him. Letting him hear it as my cries of his name echo out into the night through the screen on the window.

I begin to pant, and I know I’ll come soon. I bring my hand down behind me, and I let my finger slide over my hole and pretend it’s Sin exploring me there for the first time.

At the touch, my hips jerk up and I explode, coming over my stomach in a seemingly endless stream. Breathless, I rest against the top window pane, the glass cool on my cheek. Outside, the night is still and dark, leaving me to wonder if my shadow lover was real or just part of my fantasy.

Chapter 17

Sin

After walking Cassidy to the house and letting myself kiss him, I’m too keyed up to go inside. Leaving to find a party or a hook up doesn’t appeal either. I find myself grabbing a beer and walking the grounds until I end up settling on a hidden alcove of the property that faces Cassidy’s window.

At dinner, he said he was going to work on a research paper tonight, so I expect he’s in the library on his favorite couch, typing away and being his brilliant self.

Or is he thinking about the kiss?

A light flashes on in his room, and Cassidy walks in, and I realize I have a perfect view of him, the lamp behind him acting as a natural spotlight. I watch as he paces around his room, almost like he feels caged and on edge. Finally, he stops as if he’s come to a decision.

My breath catches in my chest as he tears off his clothes and stands there looking like a Greek statue, the perfect lean lines of his beautiful body only for me to see.

Should I remain here watching him? No, of course not, but it would take a way better man than a sinner like me to walk away.

I almost fall to my knees when he begins touching himself. A fantasy come to life. “Sin,” Cassidy calls my name, and I can’thelp my feet from taking a few steps forward to the edge of the darkness concealing me so that I can hear his every gasp and breathy moan. An army couldn’t drag me away from hearing him groan my name in bliss.

When he comes up on his knees and faces the window directly, somehow, I know it’s all for me.

“Pinch your nipple,” I direct from the shadows, unable to stop myself from trying to control his pleasure. “Slower. Edge yourself,” I demand, though I know my voice doesn’t carry to his window.

I’m jealous of his hands as they roam over his skin. I imagine how soft it feels under his palm and the velvet slide of his beautiful cock in his fist. If it were mine, I’d slow the pace of the strokes until he was shaking and sobbing for release.

And when his hand travels behind him, I know what he’s doing. I can see it play out on his face as it contracts in ecstasy. His hips arching as he begins coming, his seed splattering on his stomach and chest.

I imagine that if I were there, I’d lick up every trace of it and be mad for more.

Later that night, I lie in my bed wrung out from my own pleasure at reliving every second of watching Cassidy touch himself. I take this night as the gift that it was and know that it can’t happen again. Tomorrow, I’ll end our designated Tuesday and Thursday tutoring sessions.

As I wait for Cassidy at the bottom of the stairs, I wonder how awkward this morning will be.

Hearing his footsteps, I look up to find Cassidy greeting me with his same shy smile. “Are you giving me another lesson?” he asks as he reaches the landing.

“Lesson?” I choke out, remembering my directions from last night.

“Driving lesson?” he says.

“Yeah, sure.” I grab my keys. “Let’s get going.”

As we get in the car, I turn toward Cassidy, who is studiously going over his safe driving checklist. “Tutoring session on Thursday?”

---