Page 61 of The Lost Art of Finding Where You Belong

“Whoa,” the man said, sounding alarmed. “You shouldn’t worry about that.”

“Oh, I know,” Perian admitted. “There are, in fact, any number of logical reasons to assume that he’s fine. He’s done this a million times before. He’s one of the strongest people in the country. He’s got Cormal and Delana with him. He’s extremely good at his job. This is a normal patrol. Etc. Etc.”

Bennan eyed him. “All right, yes, you seem to have that covered.”

“You know how emotions aren’t really rational?” Perian asked.

Bennan laughed and swayed into his side, nudging him.

“Yes, you have a point.”

Perian admitted, “So I can try to drown out the feelings, but they’re never completely gone.”

Bennan was silent for a moment. “Anything I can do to help?”

“You’re already doing it,” Perian told him. “You’ve been distracting me beautifully with all your muscles and being so nice.”

Bennan grinned at him. “Aw, thank you. Especially since I’m apparently not going to see you for the next week, because once Summus gets back, you’re apparently going to be keeping him busy.”

Perian laughed. “So, so busy. You don’t even know.”

Bennan snorted a laugh. “Is it going to take him another week to recover?”

“Atleast,” Perian said proudly.

Bennan shouted with laughter, and Perian watched Chamis’s eyes seek him out and then dart away again, and he really hoped Chamis remembered everything Perian had said this morning.

Oh, no, maybe Perian shouldn’t be talking to Bennan now.

Bennan apparently picked up on his mood change because he reached out and squeezed his arm.

“It’s going to be all right, Perian. Truly. He’ll be back before you know it.”

“Thank you,” Perian said, because the other man was carefully trying to reassure him, and it wasn’t his fault it might be muddying the water after a conversation he didn’t know Perian had had with Chamis.

Bennan gave his arm one last squeeze and then jumped to his feet, and Perian could not have failed to watch him walk away.

He tried his best to stay focused on all that muscle and all those moving bodies, because that kept him from thinking about anything else. His mind kept wanting to implement a countdown, but of course, there wasn’t a fixed time for Brannal’s return.

Soon, Perian reminded himself. Brannal was coming back tomorrow. Perian had things that could fill his time todayandtomorrow. It would be fine.

He headed up to Brannal’s bedroom in time to get the blankets and then make his way back out to the garden by way of the kitchen. Renny noticed how twitchy he was, of course, but she only teased him about it a little and did her best to distract him. (She even told him she would lend him this blanket, if he needed it, but he’d better wash it afterwards. Then she collapsed laughing on the aforementioned blanket at the look onhis face. This was apicnicblanket. For his picnics withRenny. This was not a sex blanket. Perian and Brannal would be fine. Seriously. Ugh.)

He went on another ride with Prince Horsey, then fed him too many apples and carrots again, but it was a good distraction for him, and Prince Horsey seemed to love it—until one of the stable hands finally told him to go away before the horse didn’t fit in the stables anymore.

Perian made a face. “Sorry. I think I’m feeding my feelings to a horse. I’m supposed to be eating them. Or something. I’ll be better tomorrow, promise.” Then he turned to Prince Horsey. “Although if Brannal is free tomorrow afternoon, you’re not going to see me. Possibly for several days. There’s not anything happening to me, it’s just me with bad time management skills and spending all my time in bed. All right?”

Prince Horsey did not look impressed with this logic, but fortunately, he couldn’t verbally tell Perian this was a terrible plan that he did not endorse.

“Great,” Perian said cheerfully. “I’ll see you in a day or two.”

The nearest stable hands looked highly amused, but that was fine, Perian was used to engendering that kind of reaction.

Back in Brannal’s room, he got himself cleaned up and took a nap, because that was apparently something he did now.

He was up in time to meet Molun, Arvus, and Nisal, and he thought to forewarn them that when Brannal was back, he was really sorry, but he was abandoning them all.

They all rolled their eyes.

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