Page 44 of Hot to Go

‘And? You’ve not met our PE department. They’re particularly feral. Let me know when that meeting is over. I’ll come and give you a hug. Love you.’

She hangs up. And now all I have at the forefront of my mind is Charlie’s dick, his completely naked body. In the many,many times I’ve thought of him since Mallorca I used to relish that image, it used to bring me joy but now? Now it would seem that for the next academic year, I’ll have a constant reminder of someone I was incredibly sexually intimate with. Like so intimate. The things that man did. A shiver goes up my spine and I try and regain a sense of normality.

‘We thought we’d come in here, Suzie?’ a voice comes from the door. It’s Lee standing there with a notebook tucked under his arm and behind him, the figure of someone familiar.Hi there, I was just remembering what your dick looked like.

‘Yes, please come in…’ I tell them. ‘Is it just us?’ I ask. ‘I had hoped the rest of the department would be here.’

‘Oh no,’ Lee tells me. ‘I thought as you were both new, I could just run you a few things on the books for the half term. Just us today so you can get to know each other. You both have similar work histories so I think you’ll fit together well.’ I glance at Charlie, who has a big grin on his face. Yes, we’ve fit together before. But I drew a line. I drew a line because I barely knew the man. I didn’t even know his last name let alone his professional qualifications. Lee goes up to my computer to bring up the school calendar. I sit at a desk and Charlie comes to sit next to me. Seriously? How do I sit at this table so I don’t have to look at him? Is it too much to ask him to face the wall? I look up. He puts a few blue biros on the desk. They go with your eyes. Stop that now, Suzie.

‘So first days for both of you. How did it go? Any feedback?’ Lee asks. I’ll admit to quite liking Lee and his unerring enthusiasm.

‘All good. A bit of a long and hard day,’ Charlie explains. I look away. Long and hard. Long and hard. I cross my legs. If he’s done that on purpose then I hate him. ‘And I mostly did refresher lessons and basic stuff today but we’re working from the in-house grammar booklets?’ Charlie continues. ‘And all thestuff on Teams?’

‘Yes, helps to be on the same page,’ Lee adds. ‘You, Suzie?’

‘Some nice classes. I just need to get off…’ I glance at Charlie and see a smile creep across his face, ‘…early so I can go home, plan, prepare, get up to speed on a few things. I’d like to redecorate my classroom, is that OK?’

‘Marvellous. Yes, please – go to town. Whatever you want. So I’ve made a handout of important dates you need to know. Charlie, can you give her one?’

We both freeze. Oh. Give me a handout. Yes, he can do that. He slips me one. Not like that. God, why is my mind deep in the gutter?

‘Well, some other things on the calendar already. Charlie, mucho gracias for signing on for the Seville trip at half term.’

I look over at Charlie. How come he gets to go on a trip already? Not fair.

‘But before then, speaking mocks, I’m afraid.’

‘So soon?’ I ask.

‘Blame the exam boards. So some oral practice is required all round. Everyone’s skills will be a little rusty,’ Lee continues. I can’t react because if I do then I will look like a child.

‘How do you normally prepare for oral?’ Charlie asks, completely poker-faced.

‘We encourage lots of practise at home, with their peers. Actually, maybe both of you would like to run the club?’

‘There’s an oral club?’ Charlie asks, completely straight-faced.

I can’t talk. I will have to, though, at some point, so I don’t look professionally inept.

‘Mainly for the older ones. That would be a lovely thing for you both to collaborate on. Maybe I will leave that with you? Could you prepare some resources maybe?’

Charlie tries to catch my eye. Collaborate, that’s something he and I have done before. Orally. Don’t think about that atall.

‘I can do that,’ Charlie says. ‘I have some great lessons built around oracy.’

I need to contribute here, don’t I? ‘I tend to use a lot of online stuff,’ I add, my mouth completely dry. I look over and Charlie has written a note in his book. ORALLY RHYMES WITH AURELIE. He underlines it. I glare at him. ‘Just so students can model the right sounds. I’ll share some links.’

Lee stands there at the front of the room, smiling. ‘You see…this is what this department needed. A bit of youth and energy, some new ideas. Two openings perfectly filled, in my opinion.’

Charlie puts a hand to his mouth to cover his smile.

‘That’s very kind of you to say,’ I reply, proud of myself for keeping it together enough to respond so maturely.

‘Well, let’s bang the rest of this out. HR just want me to go through the performance review clauses on your contract and to make you aware of the FAP…’ he says, turning to the screen. Charlie tries to catch my eye. Do not do that. Please. I can feel him next to me. Literally that same energy I felt when he was walking next to me at that beach. When we shared a bench on that plaza. When he leaned into me and told me that he could still taste me. This is both unfair and really bloody confusing. I can’t seem to balance the two realities. How am I going to share class data with him when I know I’ve made jokes about his nipples, when we’ve both lied to each other. This doesn’t feel like the foundation on which to build anything, let alone foster a collaborative working relationship.

‘Sorry to interrupt, Lee…’ Charlie puts a hand up in the air. I sit up straight in my chair. Is he going to say something about us? Does he have a need to give full disclosure as professional courtesy? Don’t do that. Especially when I’ve not really had a say in that information being divulged. ‘I just wanted to check how long this meeting will go on for?’ he says, looking at his watch.

‘Oh, it’ll only be another half hour. I won’t keep you from your family. Don’t worry, we like you to be able to maintain that life/work balance.’

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