Page 77 of Hot to Go

‘I’m disappointed in you, scrounging jokes off the kids like that…’

‘And there was you thinking I was actually funny…’

But he is. He is so many things that I’m slowly falling for, so much so that I’m almost too scared to voice it.

There’s something about his honesty, the fact he wanted us to go for something as simple and cleansing as a walk to begin the day together, the fact he wants to rewind from all that heat in Mallorca and not just jump into all that passion and physical attraction so blindly. Most men would do it differently, they would let it dictate a relationship, overpower it. I knew someone like that. I don’t think I’ve ever met someone like you, Charlie, and that scares me a little.

‘Keep an eye on Thomas, by the way,’ he tells me. ‘He keepsasking me what fish in here can be used to make sushi,’ he says, laughing. ‘I worry that sandwich at lunch wasn’t enough for him.’ I giggle again as his hand brushes against my back and rests there for a moment. I ache for it to be there for longer. He leaves me again to re-find his group. ‘And look at that shark, muchos dientes,’ he tells them. I find my gaze following him, watching his figure disappear into the darkness again and he turns to smile at me.

‘When are we ever going to need that, Sir?’ someone complains.

I walk ahead, stopping in front of a big tank of corals and tropical fish, a ray floating past with his tiny mouth, possibly smiling at me. Next to me stands Lola who, instead of looking at the fish, looks down at her phone. I glance over and see she’s talking to Josh and they seem to be trading in fish emojis, which I hope isn’t some teen code for sexting. She sees me peering over. ‘That’s a bit rude, Miss. Looking at my private messages.’

‘I was looking at nothing,’ I lie defensively. ‘I was just surprised you want to be looking at your phone instead of all this aquatic sea life.’

‘It’s just fish, innit? My dad has a tank like this at home.’

‘With sharks?’ I say, pointing to one that swims past us.

She narrows her eyes at me, shaking her head. There’s big teen energy that comes off this one and I suspect she doesn’t find me too amusing. She looks over at me. ‘Miss, can I ask a question?’

‘Is it related to fish? I don’t think I know that much about them.’

‘No, it’s about boys.’

‘Josh?’ I guess.

‘Kinda. I just…I like him. I can talk to him for hours sometimes but I’m not too sure if I want a boyfriend right now,’ she says. I smile to think about the innocent thrill of a relationship, the long conversations with someone you’ve just met. That said,I’m impressed by the head on this girl too, for being able to cope with the idea she can survive without a relationship or a man defining her.

‘That’s fair. You can focus on your schoolwork then,’ I tell her.

‘Yeah, you sound like my mum,’ she says, unimpressed.

‘Well, if you have to find out if Josh is for you then perhaps you need to talk to the boy first.’

‘This is true,’ she says, slightly suspicious that I’ve remembered that detail. ‘That’s going to be mega awkward at school though. Like, I just go up to him one day and say hi or something…’

‘Yeah, can I borrow a pen? Isn’t maths rubbish? What have you got for your packed lunch?’ I suggest.

‘Packed lunch chat? Yeah, you’re telling me you’ve not got much rizz, Miss…’ she says, laughing.

‘Be brave, jump into the water, fully clothed,’ I tell her.

‘And what if he’s a shark?’ she asks, looking out into the tank. I think that same shark is circling us, watching. And for a moment, and quite bizarrely, I think of Paul. I think it’s the beady soulless eyes.

‘What if he hurts you? You punch him in the nose and swim away, quickly and far away,’ I say plainly, still looking at that shark.

‘Alright then, Miss…’ she says. ‘Gracias.’

‘You’re welcome.’

I notice the students I had responsibility for have walked ahead, through to another room with more tanks and I pick up my pace to catch them up as there seems to be an open rockpool where a guide is letting the kids touch the fish. Where is that Thomas kid? Do we have eyes on him?

‘Podéis usar uno o dos dedos,’ the aquarium guide says, and the kids gawp at him cluelessly.

Charlie stands to the front of the group, flaring his nostrils. ‘Did anyone get that?’ he asks.

‘Something about two?’ a voice shouts out.

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