Page 45 of Maddox

As she walked by me, heading toward the single hallway, her shoulders remained back, but her expression was one I knew far too well.

She was dead inside.

I headed to the exact place where she’d been standing. It wasn’t a club I’d wish anyone to join, no matter how heinous their crimes were.

Charmaine

I wiped my hand across the steam covering the small mirror and stared at my foggy reflection. The tiny room was sweltering, but the hot shower had allowed me to wash away the grime and… blood. I’d noticed Maddox had cleaned some grime off my skin, but there were specks everywhere including in my hair.

Turning my head slightly, I pressed my fingers across the yellowing bruise on my cheek. It hadn’t been the first time I’d been hit and likely wouldn’t be the last. I allowed my fingers to trail to the cut on my lip, fingering the slight opening. A part of me wanted to dig at the healing wound just to cause it to bleed.

Just to create physical pain, which was all I deserved.

I shifted my gaze to my eyes, noticing the lines around both. Was it possible I’d aged by several years in the last few days? Or had I not been paying attention to how many weeks and months had slipped me by? I’d been dedicated to a cause. Had I done so for the right reasons? In my mind, yes, I had.

Or at least, that’s what I’d continued telling myself during every dangerous mission, every situation that could have gone the wrong way.

Until I ran out of time.

Alfaro was a monster. There was no refuting that, but I’d latched onto needing to find a worthwhile story instead of thinking through the possible ramifications.

Fisting my hand, I adjusted the towel and tucked my hair behind both ears. I felt dead inside, absolutely devoid of anything. No anger. No misery. No heartache for lost time or lamenting over dates I’d refused to go on, relationships I’d never allowed myself to enjoy.

Just nothing.

Maybe that meant I was feeling sorry for myself. I certainly didn’t deserve to feel that way.

Maria’s husband had lost a beautiful wife, their love story one I’d been allowed to be a part of. Their wedding had been magical and I’d been the maid of honor.

Mark’s mother and father had lost a son, a man they were extremely proud of since he’d been the first one in their extended family to go to college. He’d kept the photograph ofthe day of his college graduation, his mother and father standing beside him. All with bright smiles on their faces.

Kyle’s daughter had lost her father, the little girl always eager to show off her latest ballet moves. She’d texted him just the night before and he’d managed to connect for a few minutes, able to tell her a bedtime story.

A final story.

One that would haunt her as their deaths would forever haunt me.

I glanced down at the envelope, which was now tattered, covered in dirt. With my hands shaking, I peeled it apart, studying the small jump drive I’d been given. My friends had lost their lives for a tiny piece of information. The ugliness of reality pushed me close to a personal edge. Whatever was on the drive, I would use to its fullest capabilities. Somehow, I would satisfy my need for revenge while bringing them justice.

Somehow.

I grasped the drive in my hand, curling my fingers around it.

When I opened the bathroom door, I fell against it, no longer able to feel my legs. My pulse was high, my mind suddenly spinning out of control. If only I’d listened to my editor who’d warned me the trip was too dangerous.

If only I’d heeded the warning signals that had gone off in my brain after the first threat.

If only I hadn’t been contacted by an unknown source with promises of delivering an explosive piece of evidence.

If only…

I folded my knees against my chest, wrapping my arms around them.

Suddenly, I felt his presence. There was no disguising the shower of electric charges or the scent of the man. Dirty or not, the musky fragrance of dark woods and spices was undeniable. The man was oppressive, so much so I wasn’t certain why I was so attracted to him.

The dream had remained in vivid colors in my mind during the drive. I’d latched onto it, a moment of taking back what limited sanity I had left.

The reality of touching him still seemed surreal, but he’d managed to ground me if only for a little while.

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