He was a big, cuddly bear under all that meat, and I was glad he received Nadia, even if it was before me. He needed a mate quickly. Most mammalshifters did.
Why had I lived so long without dying or going crazy? I’m not sure why. Maybe it was because I…
I scoffed internally. Yeah, not going there.
Bear’s heavy footsteps in his silver-toed boots echoed across the porch. To others they would find it intimidating and downright frightening, making them piss their pants before he even reached halfway to them but not me.
I’ve never felt more comfortable with another man besides him, in my life.
Bear pulled me into his famous bear hugs, which were only meant for Nadia and me, and rubbed his big hand on top of my head.
My dragon scowled. He hadn’t had time to filter through our memories to even know this male, but he felt my comfort in my best friend’s presence, so he let it go.
“You doing alright?”
I shook my head on his chest. “No.”
I wasn’t.
Goddess, I wasn’t okay. While I knew Bear’s past, had saved him, and brought him with me to the Iron Fang, he didn’t know mine. He never asked, not that he didn’t want to know. He left me plenty of opportunities when we both had too much to drink, but even in a drunken stupor, I wouldn’t open my mouth.
“I’m scared.” I finally admitted. I backed away from him and leaned up against the railing. “I’m not like you, Grim, or Hawke. Being big, bad, tough, that just isn’t who I am. I’d rather sit back and laugh. I fight when I need to, protect the club when called, who I care for and love... but I’m not some big, bad biker like the rest of you.”
I was far from it. If anything, I was the joke of the bar. Not that I minded.I’d rather see the girls smile and the guys shake their heads to keep their minds off their pain.
“What if she rejects me, too?”
Bear let out a long sigh and stood beside me. The crickets continued to sing, and the moon was far too bright for my mood. I’d like to think it was the goddess telling me that brighter nights were coming my way, that I should be optimistic, but that darkness lurking inside, the hurt and betrayal, still felt like yesterday.
My dragon constantly moved inside me. His serpentine body rolled, curled in on himself. He was ready to strike, ready to lurch his body into any imposing enemy. He, too, could still feel the sting of rejection.
Bear huffed in annoyance. “You don’t let her. You don’t give her a choice.”
I turned to him, dumbfounded. “Is that what you did? Just told Nadia: ‘Hey, just so you know, you’re mine.’”
Bear shrugged his shoulders. “Basically.”
Of course, Bear would do that. He isn’t the most talkative person. Plus, he’s built like a massive tree. No one would say no to him.
“What I did learn was that the bond made Nadia very… receptive.” I turned to face Bear, who continued to stare up at the moon. “While I didn’t know my first mate very well, didn’t talk to her... with Nadia, I felt an overwhelming need to keep her near my bear and protect her in the state she was in. While I healed her, she healed me. Just like every other couple that is coming together at the club.
Bear continued. “And you would have to be blind not to see that you have a hold on Elena already. She’s been compliant every time you touch her. The way you normally touch people. Simple gestures, not like the way the rest of us took our mates.”
That was an understatement. Every other male that had a mate hadpicked them up right away and had them in their arms within minutes. Hawke took a while because he was a stubborn ass, but once it finally clicked…
And Locke… once he had arms again, I’m sure he would do something with Emm.
I stared down at my hands and rubbed them together. I liked to touch Elena. Too much. I wasn’t lying when I said I was a cuddle slut. Touch was my damn love language. If I could hold her hand for the rest of my life, I would be one happy dragon.
But I wasn’t about to throw her over my shoulder and demand it. No, I wanted her to want me, too.
I cleared my throat. “She could be calm because of the bond. You know the goddess can put two people together, but they still have the choice to reject the bond. That is why we are in this situation.” I scratched the back of my neck. “She could get rid of me once I tell her…”
I stood up and walked away from Bear. I couldn’t tell himthatnow.
“Anaki, for fuck’s sake, spit it out. What the hell are you so worried about? She already knows you are a dragon, that there are shifters. You jumped the biggest damn hurdle of them all today. She accepted all of it. All of this.” He waved his hand around us. “She’s in our territory. She ain’t going anywhere. And that bag of bones in there is okay with all of it! She knows shit!”
“I heard that!” The grandmother shouted from the inside.