He was everything I wanted but couldn’t have.
I bit my tongue. It wasn’t like he was into me anyway; he was just part of the care team. His flirting hadn’t gone unnoticed, but it was just part of his personality, that’s all.
Anaki patted Luis on the head. “Sorry to say, but you will have to dealwith Tajah longer. I have to work tonight.”
My ears perked up. He won’t be around?
I internally scoffed at myself. Why should I care? This is what I wanted, right? To stay as far away from him as possible? Who cares if he was the center of my fantasies with those gray sweatpants, those tight muscle shirts he wore, and how he doted on me even when I gave him the evil eye?
It was so hard to stay away from him, even if I wanted to touch him. Feel that warmth spread across my body and made my aches and pains go away.
Luis hung his head. “But we were going to play Uno tonight.”
Abuela chastised from her seat on the couch. “He has other jobs than watching us, Luis. Besides, you're going to hurt Tajah and Beretta’s feelings.”
Beretta let out a soft cry. She curled up her hand, resembling a kitten, to wipe away an imaginary tear. “I thought we had become friends. I was going to show you my panther.”
Luis’ eyes widened. “You’d show me your panther?”
Luis stepped away, his young squirrel brain taking him elsewhere.
Their conversation faded into the background while my panic rose.
Anaki wouldn’t be here tonight. I had comfort knowing he was close in just the few days I’ve known him. I wasn’t sure why. He had a way of calming me when no one else could.
Maybe it was because it was the first time I’ve had trust in a man. One that didn’t look so imposing and looked like I was a pebble in his shoe. One I didn’t have to prove my worth to.
He knew I had a son and a sickness I couldn’t control. A sister who was a pain in everyone’s ass and a grandmother who claims she is a witch.
He accepted me, but I couldn’t accept myself.
The conversations rose, and when I came back to my senses, I saw that Anaki no longer stood at the door. My eyes bulged and I rose to go to thekitchen. I acted as calmly as I could, since I didn't want to show my panic.
Was he gone? Did he leave already? I glanced out the window as I tried to see his fading figure. There wasn’t anything there, and then I felt the heat of a body behind me.
I knew who it was. The aches in my body faded away in an instant. His warm breath tickled my ear as he whispered, "Looking for me?"
I jumped in surprise anyway, spinning around to face him. His eyes bore into mine, a mischievous glint dancing within them. The proximity of his body sent a wave of warmth through me, and I struggled to maintain my composure.
"What are you doing?" I stammered, trying to sound nonchalant.
Anaki flashed a charming smile, his dimples deepening. "Couldn't stay away, could I? Especially when someone was missing me so much."
I rolled my eyes, attempting to mask the rapid beating of my heart at his words. "Don't flatter yourself. I just... noticed you were gone."
His gaze softened, a hint of understanding in his eyes. "You missed me," he stated simply.
Before I could protest further, Anaki closed the distance between us, his hand reaching out to tuck a loose strand of hair behind my ear. The tender gesture tugged at my heartstrings, and I found myself leaning into his touch despite my better judgment.
"I missed you, too," he confessed softly, his voice barely above a whisper. “Earlier, and the past few days, you’ve been pushing me away.”
My heart felt like it was about to burst out of my chest as I searched his eyes for any sign of deceit. But all I found was sincerity and something more... something that mirrored the unspoken emotions swirling within me.
As if drawn by an invisible force, our faces inched closer until our lips were mere inches apart.
“You are part of a care team. You are here to keep us quiet. That’s all.” I managed to say.
Anaki chuckled, both hands landed on either side of my hips to pin me. There was no way out. His body was flush with mine, and I felt the large prominent thickness between his legs that had been the focus of all my fantasies.