Page 24 of Social Sinners

We spent a few more minutes on the phone, and after we hung up, River and I embarked upon our Halo mission until the wee hours of the night. I knew if I even tried to sleep, I’d be reliving that shit from the session with East. I waited until my brain was too numb to protest and crashed into a dreamless sleep.

The next morning, I was up and at the treatment center at the start of visiting hours; ten a.m. Dr. Linden was meeting us there for a follow-up session.

“Good morning, Diamond,” she greeted me as I entered the off they’d allowed her to use while onsite. Much to my surprise, Easton was already waiting inside.

“Good morning, Doc,” I told her, leaning over to give Easton a good morning kiss before seating myself in the chair beside him.

“Easton,” she began, “tell me how last night went for you.”

“Well, I live to breathe another day,” he half laughed, fidgeting with his hands. Sadly, it fell short as neither the doctor nor I knew how deep those words rang true for him. Reaching over, I took his hands in mine, hoping to soothe his nerves. “I think it went okay. To be honest, I was too scared to sleep. Every time I dozed off, I force myself to wake up.” Usually, when he blushed, I thought it was cute but this time I knew it was due to the embarrassment he felt in admitting that.

“Easton,” Dr. Linden said, waiting for him to look up and acknowledge her. When he did, she continued, “I know you’re afraid, but the only way we’ll know if the hypnosis worked is for you to allow yourself to fall into a deep sleep.”

“I’m terrified,” he mumbled so low I could hardly hear him.

“East, if I were right beside you would you try and sleep?” I asked him, not even sure if they’d let me crash here, but it was worth a try.

“Yes.” He nodded before asking Dr. Linden, “Would that be possible?” The hope behind his question brightened his previously somber mood. I just hoped they didn’t shoot it down.

“Well, it’s a bit unconventional but not completely unheard of. Let me speak with the administrator and see if we can make that possible. I do have to tell you, Easton, if we can’t get your mind to stop holding you captive, then I won’t be able to sign off on your discharge papers.” She stood. “I’ll be right back.”

“East,” I turned to him once we were alone, “are you really okay?”

“I don’t know what’s going on anymore. I don’t even know what day it is or why you’re here. I’m a fucking mess, you could do so much better than me,” he said as he began to cry. It fucking breaks my heart that he thinks so little of himself.

“Babe, look at me.” When he turned, another tear freed itself, and I kissed it away. “There is no one else for me. Don’t you get it? I love you for you, and that’s never going to change. You’re it for me. Now and forever.” I fisted his cardigan, pulling him to me. I couldn’t wrap my arms tightly enough around him; it was like I needed him inside my skin. “Marry me?” I blurted out, not believing those words came from my mouth and yet I didn’t regret them once they broke free.

“Wha, what?” He pulled back. “You did not just ask me that? In my therapist’s office of all places, did you?”

Seems I wasn’t the only one stunned by those two little words. Words I never in a million years imagined would ever come from my confirmed bachelor lips. But all that changed for me last year when I damn near lost my entire family. Giving in to my feelings for Easton was the best fucking choice I ever made.

“Yeah, I did. Maybe not the right place, hell, couldn’t be worse timing either but I said them, and I meant them.”

Dr. Linden chose that moment to walk in. “Is everything alright?”

Easton was still staring at me, but the disbelief on his face changed right before my eyes. Morphing into something else. Happiness? Hope? Dare I believe my words may have been something he needed to hear? Perhaps a guiding force leading him toward the light he’d been seeking at the end of the tunnel?

“Yes,” he smiled, still staring at me, “everything’s going to be all right, Doc.” And there it was again, that glimmer of life in his tired eyes.

“They agreed to let you stay here tonight, Diamond,” she informed us. I could feel the inevitablebutcoming next. “Keep in mind the disclaimer you signed before initially visiting Easton still stands. All that you see and hear stays here.”

“That’s a given,” I assured her.

“They’ve asked that you refrain from coitus,” she added. Easton blushed beside me. While he got embarrassed, I actually got a little pissed about that. He obviously didn’t share with her during any of his sessions that our couplings, for lack of a better term, relaxed him. If he wanted to keep that between the two of us, I sure as hell wouldn’t be the one to let his secret out. But it still felt like something vital for her to hear.

“Fine,” I replied. Not a yes or a no because telling Easton no, wasn’t an option for me and if that got us into trouble so be it. Whatever kind of trouble that could possibly be, it’d be worth it in the long run… if that’s what Easton needed and wanted from me, then that’s what Easton would get.

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