Page 18 of Pity the Living, Not the Dead

“I’m not going through chemo. The doctor already told me it would buy me very little time. I’m going to Switzerland with Elijah to undergo a treatment there. They’ve seen positive results from tests they’ve run, but it hasn’t been approved in the States yet.” Again, their voices drowned out Liam’s, and I’d wasted my last nerve on these infuriating humans.

Once again, I whistled. When they quieted, I spoke. “Do you hear yourselves? This beautiful, wonderful man is trying to tell you he’s dying, and all you can do is argue with each other and try to force his decisions for him? He’s an adult, he’s done his research, and he knows what he wants.”

“How do you even know this will work? Is this something you talked him into?” Finn asked, more like demanded, as he crossed the room, entering my personal space.

“I’ll tell you right now, attacking me isn’t the way to go. I invested in this company and have been following their progress adamantly. Their research in fighting various types of cancer has produced phenomenal results. I want only the best for Liam, nothing else will do. Liam has agreed, and we will be leaving tomorrow. End of discussion.” I was so close to punching Finn that my hands were shaking.

“This is non-negotiable,” Liam told them. “I’ve made my decision and it’s final. I’ll keep in touch with Olivia. She can tell you how I’m doing and what’s going on if you’re really interested. Up until now, none of you have given two shits about me, and I’m done,” Liam said, storming from the room and up the stairs.

“Why don’t you go check on him?” Olivia said to me. “First door on the left. I’ll handle them.”

“Thank you.”

I should have known this would not go well. I’d given my family more chances than you could imagine to acknowledge me, to treat me like a real member of this family. Butthis— this was the last straw. If it weren’t for Elijah, I’d have run away the day after my birthday, but our chance meeting changed everything for me. Yet he was here. My rock. My hero. My love.

I glanced around my room, realizing once again that everything in it had been chosen by my mother. I’d never been comfortable enough to make the space my own. The bedding, the wall décor, even my clothes weren’t what I’d have selected if I’d gone shopping for these things myself. I loaded up my laptop, then grabbed what little clothes I wanted and put them in my luggage.

“Need some help?” Elijah’s welcome voice surprised me. He wrapped those arms in which I sought solace around me. I could finally breathe again. For so long, I had felt like an elephant sat on my chest and had walked on eggshells around my family. This ended tonight. Elijah was my breath of fresh air. My stability. My family.

“I’m sorry about them,” I apologized.

“Don’t ever apologize for them. They do not deserve it. If they are too blind to see what a wonderful, caring man you are, then they aren’t worth your time. Now tell me what you want to bring with us so we can get out of here and start our life together.”

I pointed out what was going and what was staying, and in a matter of minutes, we had my messenger bag, two pieces of luggage, and a duffle bag filled. One last scan of the room and I discovered that what remained was not really me and held no place in my new life. This was now my past, and not a pleasant one at that. “That’s it, let’s go.”

We walked downstairs virtually unnoticed until my mother came around the corner. “Liam,” she said, tears streaming down her face. “I’m so sorry. I never thought. I never realized. I’m sorry.” She cried unconsolably.

“Momma,” I said, dropping the luggage to hug her. “I’ll make sure you and Liv have Elijah’s number so you can check in with him on my progress. They said my immune system will be weakened even more than it already is, so I’ll be in the ICU and won’t be allowed visitors for my own safety.”

She nodded and turned to Elijah. “You take good care of my baby boy, Elijah.”

“I promise I will,” Elijah assured her, and I knew without a doubt his words were true.

Elijah and I hugged Olivia, who was standing nearby. She took one of the bags from him and walked out with us. “Please, update me daily. Call or text me even if there is no news. I need to hear from you. I need to know you’re okay,” she said to both of us.

“We will. I’ll text you Elijah’s number, so you have it. It’s a long flight, so don’t worry when you haven’t heard from us in the first twelve or fifteen hours.” I knew how worried she would be. After a tear-filled goodbye, Elijah and I were on the road headed home.

To our home.

The first place I’d been where I felt welcome. Comfortable enough to take off my shoes and kick back. How quickly had this happened? My head was spinning, trying to absorb the huge changes in my life taking place in the span of only a handful of days.Is this normal?I was sure the answer was no, but given the shittastic medical card I’d been dealt, fast-tracking our relationship seemed inevitable.

“Are you all right, love?” Elijah asked after we’d set in silence for too long.

“No, but I will be. Thanks to you,” I replied. Where would I be without Elijah? Buried in medical questions and wasted chemo treatments. Suffering through what would be left of a pain-filled existence. Unlike some, I had an option—a way out. It was sad to think about others not being allotted the same. Could any of them have made a difference? If one had been able to survive, could they have held the key to curing cancer? World peace? Humanity will never know.

“Well, don’t thank me yet. Like I told you before, it will be painful. Trust me, you’ll be cursing my name.” He winked, I’m sure more to ease the harshness of his honest words than for flirtation. “When did you want to do this?”

“Tomorrow night. I’d like to watch one more sunrise and sunset before there will be no more.”

And I did just that, slipping in bed beside Elijah after watching the sunrise, then waking before him to watch the sunset. I was up in between those times, as well, unpacking and familiarizing myself with everything in the house. Anything to keep my mind busy. I was restless and didn’t sleep well, never able to fully shut down. Was I scared? Absofuckinglutely terrified. But the alternative wasn’t an option. I’d made my choice, and I was sticking with it.

“Hello, my love,” Elijah said, taking the seat beside me on the porch swing after waking.

“Hello.”

“I’d ask you how you slept,” Elijah began, “but the bags under your eyes answered that question for me.”

“Gee, thanks,” I quipped.

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