Page 57 of When We Collide

“Oh, I am indeed, yes. Thank you for inviting us. It’s been a while since I’ve had a good barbeque.” I didn’t invite him. My mother-in-law did. Ever since this man stood at my door over a year ago and broke the news of Dean’s death to me—or shall I say bald-faced lied—I harbour a deep dislike for him and I’m not one to hold onto grudges.

“Of course. I imagine with your line of work it doesn’t leave a whole lot of time to socialise or spend time with your family.”

Chief Scott smiles and takes a sip of his beer. “It absolutely does not, but civilians get to enjoy their time because soldiers sacrifice theirs. It’s a small price to pay for keeping our beloved country safe, knowing families can sleep easy at night with us watching the skies.”

My eyes find Dean across the garden laughing with his squadron members and I smile. “I promise you, it’s not easy sleeping at night knowing your heart is out there somewhere and may not make it home.”

Chief Scott follows my gaze and smiles. “No one said it was easy loving a hero.”

As if sensing me watching him, Dean turns his gaze and his endless green eyes interlock with mine. “Loving him is the easiest thing I have ever done. It’s the distance, the never-ending fear that grips your heart when they’re away for months at a time and the sacrifices...thoseare hardest parts of loving a hero.”

“Spoken like a true military wife,” Chief Scott's voice resounds with admiration. “It's clear how fiercely and deeply the two of you love each other. You must be bursting with pride for him.” I nod, reluctantly pulling my gaze away from Dean to look at Chief Scott. My heart swells with pride and love as I think of all that Dean has accomplished. “Being chosen for such a prestigious program is a great honour for any officer, and it will surely open many doors for him in the future. Dean is the first pilot from our region to have been selected, and we couldn't be more thrilled.” Despite my efforts to keep my smile in place, it falters as confusion creeps into my mind.

What prestigious program is he talking about? “I'm sorry, prestigious program?” I ask, unable to hide my bewilderment.

“Ah, here comes the hero of the hour,” Chief Scott says with a grin as Dean joins us. “I was just telling your lovely wife about the incredible offer you received from Falconridge Academy and how proud we are of you.” My heart swells even more as I gaze at Dean, filled with admiration and love for the man standing before me.

But what am I missing here?

“Falconridge?” I ask, turning to Dean for an explanation. “What’s Falconridge?”

“Dean, you haven’t told her yet about the offer?”

Dean avoids my eyes and scratches his forehead awkwardly. “No sir, I haven’t yet.”

“What offer?” I demand, my tone clipped as I stare at him, waiting for an answer.

“I was going to talk to you about it later.”

Before Dean can respond, Chief Scott jumps in eagerly. “Falconridge is an elite academy for fighter pilots. They only recruit the best of the best, and Dean has been put forward as a top candidate.” My shoulders that were bunched in agitation a second ago start to relax. Okay, that’s not so bad. My husband is considered the crème de la crème of fighter pilots. I can certainly live with that.

My eyes volley between Dean and Chief Scott and for some odd reason I can feel a knot starting to form in my gut. “Well, that’s exciting.”

“You’re both going to love Florida,” Chief Scott chirps, gives Dean a pat on the shoulder and walks off. And there it is. My heart drops like a lead balloon deep into my stomach.Huh?

“Flori—what?” I stammer, gaping at his retreating back. Did he just say we’re going to loveFlorida? Why the fuck would I love Florida?

“JJ, come with me.” Dean’s fingers lace with mine, he pulls me toward the house and guides me up the stairs toward his old bedroom. I observe Dean as he closes the door and leans against it with a sigh. “I was going to talk to you when we got back home.”

“Talk to me about what, Dean? What the hell is going on? Why did your Chief of Air just say we’re going to love Florida?”

“Because the academy is in Florida.” My jaw goes slack and for the second time today I gape at my husband—or ratherex-husband—without blinking. “The programme is for a year with an opportunity as an aviation instructor after graduation.”

No, goddamn it, not again.

The back of my eyelids sting and I blink away the onslaught of tears I can feel coming. “What? So, you’re just up and leaving for anotheryear?” Dean shakes his head and takes a step toward me, his hands reaching for me, but I retreat and shake my head, holding my arms out to keep him at a distance. “It sounds to me like you’ve made up your mind already without talking to me first.”

Dean shakes his head, takes my hand into his and pulls me to him and this time I allow him, but deep inside I have the biggest urge to pound my fists into his stupid face. “No, JJ, I haven’t.Listen to me, I’m not going anywhere without you or DJ, all right?”

“So, you’ve declined the offer, then? Because he seems to think we’re going to Florida, Dean.”

“No, I haven’t given them an answer yet. I wanted to talk to you about it first, but Chief Scott beat me to it.”

“Okay, I’m listening, talk...”

Dean pulls me over to his old bed and we sit facing each other. The room is small and stuffy, the air thick with tension. I watch him as he speaks, and I can already tell how much this means to him and it kills me. His eyes are bright with excitement, but there's also a touch of nervousness in them.

“Look, I’m not going to lie to you,” he begins, his voice earnest. “This opportunity only comes around once in a lifetime, and it is every fighter pilot's dream to be selected by this academy. You’re trained by the best instructors and the program focuses on advanced air combat techniques and tactics.”

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