Page 7 of When We Collide

“…during the emergency surgery to control the bleeding and save your life, we had to make a critical decision. The rupture was extensive, and to stop the haemorrhage, we had no choice but to perform a hysterectomy… we had to remove your uterus.”

My eyes snap up to look at him and I feel something inside me sink. “What?” I utter, looking from him to my parents. “You—you removed my uterus?”

“Unfortunately, yes. As I explained the rupture was extensive beyond repair, which didn’t leave us with much choice. Jeyla, I understand that this is difficult news to hear, but we had to prioritize your immediate health and safety. You lost a significant amount of blood.”

“So, what does that mean? I can’t have any more children?”

Dr Kent nods in response. “Yes, that’s correct. We did our very best to repair the damage and stop the bleeding, but the damage was just far too extensive. The hysterectomy was the very last resort,” he explains sympathetically. “Your recovery is our main focus now. Physically, you'll need time to heal from the surgery. We'll manage your pain and monitor you closely to ensure there are no complications. Emotionally, this can be very challenging, and we have support services, including counselling, that I strongly recommend you consider. Particularly, after what you’ve been through recently.”

No amount of counselling is going to help me after everything I have lost. I don’t even know how to react or feel to that news. I mean, before I found out I was pregnant after my accident, I didn’t think I would ever conceive and while it was devastating, I eventually accepted and made my peace with it. But now, it feels as though I’m reliving that trauma all over again.

Blinking away the tears that gather in my eyes, I look up at him. “Just promise me that you will save my son. Please?”

Dr Kent reaches over and pats my shoulder, “Of course; your son has the best paediatric team caring for him around the clock.Please do not worry and focus on getting some rest. The more you stress, the longer it will take your body to heal and for your milk to come in. Your baby is a fighter, just like you, and he will be in your arms where he belongs before you know it.”

I sure hope so, because right now, those words are all I have to hold on to. With trembling hands, I clutch at the frayed edges of hope and hold on for dear life.

Hours goby and with each one I become more restless. My eyes are glued to the window in my hospital room, the fear of losing my son crippling me more than the epidural they administered. Bitterly I watch the world outside continue on without a care while my heart is gripped with fear.

The sun slowly sets, casting a warm orange glow across the walls of my hospital room. Every footstep that echoes down the hallway causes me to hold my breath, hoping it's not the dreaded news that my baby has given up the fight before I even get a chance to hold him.

Each time the door creaks open and a nurse enters to check my vitals, my heart leaps into my throat, anticipating the worst. It'sa sickeningly morbid thought, isn't it? I should be filled with joy and excitement at the arrival of mine and Dean's baby. Instead, I am held captive by this haunting anticipation of death. My heart aches with a mix of love and terror, desperate for any sign of hope or life from within me. But all I can do is wait and pray for a miracle.

I couldn’t keep the man I love, so please, don’t take the last thing I have left of him—let me keep our baby. I think I deserve that much.

I keep waiting for Dean to show up, like he usually does when I’m feeling my worst, but this time he doesn’t.

A light knock on the door pulls me from those morose thoughts. My heart clenches in my chest when the door slowly opens, and Oscar pokes his head in and smiles. “Hey, you’re awake. Are you up for some company, kid?”

Releasing the breath I didn’t even know I’d been holding, I rest my head back against the soft pillow and nod, grateful for a moment’s distraction from my distressing thoughts.

“How are you feeling?” Oscar questions as he walks over and takes a seat in the

armchair by my bedside. “Are you in any pain?”

I shake my head, “Tired and numb, mostly.”

“That’s expected with the pain medication they’ve been giving you. The doctor said your body has been through quite an ordeal with the pregnancy and then the tear. It will take a couple of weeks and some serious rest to recover.” Oscar explains, his soft brown eyes lifting to look up at the bag of blood being transfused back into my body. “Ash is still here as well. She fell asleep in thevisitor’s lounge so I thought I would sneak in here to see if you needed anything?”

My eyes well up, suddenly feeling overwhelmed with emotion, “I can never repay nor thank you and Ash for everything you’ve done for me since...”

Oz nods in understanding and smiles faintly as he sits forward in the chair and takes my hand into his. “Jey, stop it. You’refamily. Of course we’re going to be here for you, and no, it’s not because we made a promise to Dean that we will always watch out for you. It’s because we love you and you would do the same without a moment’s hesitation for any one of us.”

He's not wrong. I absolutely would. Oscar and Ashlyn are no different to my own siblings. If anything, I’m closer to them than I am to Jess and Jaden. They’ve been there for me through every trial and tribulation, never wavering in their support or love… especially Oscar.

“You've both done so much for me,” I continue, my eyes welling up with tears. “You've selflessly put aside your own grief over losing your brother to help me through mine. And even when I shut you both out, you still never gave up on me.” My heart expands with gratitude as I gaze at him, my pillar of strength during the darkest moments of my life. “I'm just so grateful for you both,” I add, my voice barely above a whisper. “Even if I don't show it, I truly don't know if I would have made it through any of this without you and Ash.” As if sensing my overwhelming emotions, Oscar's fingers tighten around mine and he brushes his thumb over my knuckles in a comforting gesture. Both his and Ashlyn’s unwavering love and support are like a lifeline pulling me from the depths of my despair.

“You want to know how you can thank us?” Oscar questions, smiling. “By taking care of yourself, resting, and getting back on your feet. I know it’s not that easy, you have lost so much more than you can bear, but I know you have the strength to pull through all of it, Jeyla. You have the biggest, most beautiful reason to fight, right down that corridor and he needs you more than any of us.”

“How is he, Oskie?”

“He’s perfect, Jey.”

“Don’t lie to me to make me feel better. Be straight with me. How is he really?”

Oskie lifts my hand and closes his other hand around both of ours and squeezes reassuringly.

“I am being straight with you, I swear,” he affirms, staring into my eyes. “He’s small of course, and has some growing to do, but other than that the doctors have confirmed that he is healthy and well. In fact…” Oz lifts his hand and reaches into his pocket to pull out his phone. “I knew you would be restless and wouldn’t relax until you see him, so I took some photos of him.” He pulls up a photo of the baby and hands his phone to me.

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