Page 16 of Devil's Due: Sarge

“Maybe I listen to you try to bullshit your way out of suggesting new clothing in exchange for sex and not call you on it?”

She’s a freaking comedian. Shaking my head, I can’t stop myself from laughing. “Yeah, maybe.”

That answer seems to appease her. Her shoulders settle, then she nods once, chuckling under her breath, and turns to gather up the paltry number of things she keeps inonedrawer. The only other thing she has is that sex kitten dress she wore to the party last week hanging in the closet. She shoves them all into a beat-up black leather backpack. I’m not sure how she’s been surviving with so few personal items.

The backpack clearly isn’t heavy, but I lift it from her hand and fling it over my shoulder. Then I lace our fingers together to lead her down to my room.

I hate mess. I hate clutter. A cluttered room leads to a cluttered mind. When I open the door, I know exactly what she sees: the bed is made, no clothes or change scattered on the floor. No trash cans overflowing with fast food bags or any of that kind of shit. This room is a room I don’t mind bringing a woman to, especially this woman.

“Where am I supposed to sleep?” she asks. “On the floor or something?”

“You’re not sleeping on the floor.”

“Okay then, where areyousleeping?”

“In the bed,” I answer with a hint of sarcasm, because seriously?

“But there’s only one bed.”

“Very astute.”

“I can’t share a bed with you! We hardly know each other. And besides, I’m a solitary sleeper. I’ve never shared a bed. Even after sex – they finished their business and took off. Even when I had a boyfriend, he never stayed the night, at least not in my bed—he did crash on the sofa a few times, but we don’t need to go into that.” Her words become more frantic as she chases each one with the next.

“Baby, it’s a big bed. You’ll survive. Don’t pretend like you didn’t know this is where we were headed. It’s a comfortable bed with a great mattress, and I put in enough years sleeping on the fucking ground. I’m done with that shit. You officially accepted the fact that you’re my woman now out there in the common room. I’m not sleeping on the floor, and I’m not sleeping on a couch, especially after sex – and before you say anything, yes, we will be having sex. A fuck of a lot of it, and you’re going to be the one asking for it.”

She stands there staring at me, mouth hanging open, arms crossed over her chest, plumping up her tits. She finally finds her voice. “What – What makes you think I’ll ever ask for sex from you?”

Now, I’m no braggart, but you couldn’t really consider me hard on the eyes and women tend to love my dick – maybe not as much as Vlad’s, the man was legendary until he met Nic, and she typically has a smile on her face around him. But I can’t complain, and I’ve never had a woman complain.

“I get my hand down your pants, show you a little finger action, you’ll bebeggingto ride me, baby.”

“Uh— you certainly seem to think a lot of yourself.”

“I’m just stating the truth here. We both know that you’ve never had a man like me before. But I can honestly say, I’ve never had a woman like you before, either.”

She softens her stance, relaxing her arms a bit. “What kind of woman do you think I am?” she asks.

“Cultured, highly educated –uptight.” I probably should’ve left off that last part, seeing as her body goes rigid once more. And the way she scowls at me, I’m uncertain if I want to laugh, kiss her, or sleep with one eye open for fear that she might gut me in the dark.

“I’m not uptight,” she says in a softly resigned voice, and holy shit – I think I hurt her feelings.

Dammit.I didn’t mean to hurt her feelings. Tossing the bag on the bed, I take the few steps to get to her, pulling her into my arms, and hold on, pressing my lips to the top of her head. “Sorry, baby, that was an asshole thing to say.”

“My dad, my real dad, died of cancer when I was young. My mom was this young, widowed, single mother, and she was lost. We struggled all the time. She worked two jobs, and there still wasn’t enough money to make ends meet. She became fixated on meeting a rich man, someone to ease her burdens.” She sniffled with her face pressed against my chest.

This feels like a real intimate moment, one that we shouldn’t be standing for. I lead her over to the bed, where we lie down on top of the covers because I don’t want her to feel like this is anything more than what it is – her unloading something she needs to unload, and me taking it.

After wrapping her in my arms again, cocooning her with my body to give her a safe space, I prod her. “Go on.”

“You don’t know what it was like. I know, I know – everyone thinks poor little spoiled rich girl. But I wasn’t. My stepdad never thought girls were very useful, aside from marrying them once they became women. He wanted my mom, but he didn’t want me. He brought me into his house to live because we were a package deal, but he and his sons never really accepted me.” She sighs and it breaks my heart. “I’m not asking for you to feel sorry for me. I just don’t want you to think I’m uptight. It’s just – It’s just really hard for me to trust people because in the circles they hung around in, every one of those people would smile and say something sweet to your face, then turn around and stab you in the back.”

“That sucks, baby. I wouldn’t still be alive today if I didn’t trust my men to have my back, and they didn’t trust me to have theirs. You’re right… I can’t imagine what it was like. You must’ve been really lonely.”

“And I missed my dad, but I wasn’t allowed to talk about him. My stepdad didn’t care to talk to me at any time, and my mother was afraid that if he heard me say my dad’s name, it would make him feel bad, and she didn’t want to risk losing the cushy life we had.”

We lie in the bed holding each other for quite a while silently, in our own thoughts, and it occurs to me that I can’t recall another time in my life where I felt this serene. Not even with the one woman I was supposed to feel this serene with.

Why her? She’s beautiful, no doubt. But I’ve met a lot of beautiful women in my life. Why does she give me such a sense of calm? What is it about her, that thing that makes her so different from everyone else I’ve ever known? I shouldn’t question it. I should just accept it and be damn glad that I found it – but I don’t think I deserve it. No, I know I don’t deserve it. I’m just too damn greedy to let someone more deserving have her.

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