Page 2 of Marriage (Red, White &) Blues

“You two… have been friends for thelast year?” My voice might have risen at the end there, but I had the presence of mind to shake his hand. Carl looked concerned. Mom just looked guilty. “Look, Mom, you’re an adult. You don’t have to report to me, but it would’ve been nice to know you’d met someone. This is huge and you didn’t think to tell me?”

The three of us stood there in this sort of standstill and as I took her in, I realized that I didn’t know her anymore. We didn’t look alike. With her trimmer figure, cute brown bob, and hazel eyes, when people who didn’t know us saw us together, they thought we were friends. Now, I didn’t even feel like a friend.

“I just wanted?—”

I held my hand up. Hurt didn’t begin to cover how I felt about this situation. “It’s very nice to meet you, Carl. I hope you’ll come around more often now. I’m heading up to my room.” Then over my shoulder, I threw out a, “Carry on.”

It wasn’t my proudest moment. I ran up the stairs with tears in my eyes like a damn teenager. Talk about the drama! But I couldn’t help it. As I reached my room, I called Sierra—or I tried to call Sierra. When she didn’t answer, I looked at the time because girl shouldn’t have still been sleeping unless she had a headache or kept a really late night and I already knew that wasn’t the case. I called again, worried about her now.

This time, she answered. “Gloria, hey, sweetie. This isn’t a good time.”

“Oh, okay. Are you on a date?”

“No. I’m at the movies with Beth from work. We’re watching that new comedyShe Shed.”She Shed? My stomach sank, sank right to the damn floor. Sierra and I were supposed to go see that together. “I’ll let you know how it is.”

“Yeah, okay… sure. Have fun.” I disconnected the call determined not to cry and then immediately pressed Pen’s contact.

She answered on the first ring. “Hey, Gloria…” She giggled.

“Hey, Gloria,” Ant said in the background. “Pen’s going to have to call you back. She’s about ready to be very distracted.”

“Ant,” Pen admonished him.

“It’s okay. Don’t behave,” I said, laughing, although I really didn’t feel it.

“Don’t plan on it,” he said right before I hung up.

Good. Great. Okay. My mother lied to me for a year, Sierra broke plans with me to hang out with a different friend and Pen was too wrapped up in marital bliss to bother with me. So what? I was an independent woman. The time had come for me to start acting like it.

While I sat in my room alone, I opened my laptop and pulled up a blank Word doc. At the top, I typed:Change Gloria’s Life. For the next hour I planned on how to make that happen. Mom had a new man. Maybe I needed a man. Sierra had new friends. Maybe I needed new friends, too. Pen and Ant had loads of sex. No maybe about this one. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d sweated in the sheets from more than the flu.

Everything sort of went by in a blur from that night on.

I checked my bank account to see about my savings. Then I applied for a passport and got that expedited to me. Even expedited, it took a while to arrive, which gave me more time to save up money. Finally, I quit my job. Yeah, I quit my job. Why? BecausebackpackingacrossEurope! Yes, me. It was numberfour on theChange Gloria’s Lifedocument—you know, behind a new man, new friends, and loads of sex.

Nothing was keeping me here. Mom spent most nights with Carl now that they’d broken the seal on that one. We went from talking every day to radio silence unlessItextedher.I saw my friends occasionally. And by friends, I meant Pen and Ant. I wasn’t ready to forgive Sierra. I didn’t care that she went to a movie with a different friend. But we’d already planned to see that together and she disregarded me and my feelings. And then to say ‘she’d tell me how it was’ as if I’d go see it alone? My friends had lives to live—I got that. But now I did too. I didn’t tell even one of them about leaving. Why would I? None of them bothered to keep me in their life loops. Gone were the days of reliable Gloria, always around when orifthey decided to call.

Once I landed in France, if one of them called, then I’d tell them. “Sorry, I can’t go to your BBQ. I’m in France.” Petty? Probably. But I got tired of being ignored. The afterthought.

Finally, the night of my big trip arrived. I flew coach. Part of me wanted that first-class experience like Pen had on her honeymoon, but my bank account outright laughed at me, stating that was a truly bad idea if I planned to stay as long as I hoped to.

After hours of being stuck between a loud snorer and a man-spreader, of continually being kicked in the back of my seat, of listening to a colicky baby cry, we landed in Paris.Paris. As in Paris, France.

Despite being dog-ass tired and looking a mess, I smiled all the way to customs. As I planned to backpack, I’d only brought a carry-on with me—the bag all the traveler blogs said you just ‘had to have’when embarking on this kind of adventure.

Outside the airport, I flagged down a taxi. Thankfully, I’d taken four years of French in high school and minored in it in college.

The sun had barely cracked the sky. Welcome to the first stop on my adventure. But being awake at dawn in the city of love made being awake at dawn that much nicer.

My phone rang.

Sierra.

Did I even want to talk to her? “Hello?” I answered because I decided yes. I wanted her to know I currently stood inParisfreakingFrance.

“Gloria, girl… where are you? Your mom said she went to the house and you were gone. Your note said something about a new life? What in the hell is going on?”

“Exactly like my note said. My mom spends every night with Carl. You and Pen are busy living your lives. So, I decided to start living mine.”

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