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“How the fuck am I supposed to do that?” I whisper-yell back at her.

“I don’t know. The way you do everything else…Be intimidating. Just tell him I’m not here.” She offers me an embarrassed smile, darting off to Corey’s room and shutting the door behind her. It leaves me to deal with her angry, very loud father, so I slap my cheeks a few times to wake myself up before opening the door.

I don’t know why Frank Dawson looks so shocked when I answer the door, this is my fuckin’ house he’s knockin’. I follow his eye line when it drops down to the boxers I’m wearing and realize what's got him so intimidated.

“What d’ya expect when you drag a man outta bed first thing in the mornin’?” I frown at him. Trying to ignore the fact that my morning wood was probably on full display to his daughter, too.

“I know this isn’t a good time, but I’m looking for Millie. She’s your brot–I mean, she was?—”

“Relax, she’s here.” I put the guy outta his misery and open the door wider, leading him toward Corey's room where Millie’s hiding. A woman, who I assume is his wife, rushes down the path, stepping through the door and looking unimpressed by her surroundings as she follows him in.

“Millie? Where is she? What did you do to her?” she calls out dramatically, and I cock my brow at her hysteria before opening the door to reveal their daughter sitting on Corey’s bed.

“I knew you’d rat me out.” Millie shakes her head as if she’s disappointed in me.

“Darling, you're okay.” Her mother runs toward her. “We’ve been worried out of our minds.” Grabbing her face in her hands, she searches her over as if she’s expecting her to be hurt.

“I’m fine, I just needed some space.” Millie remains blank as her mother wraps her up in her arms.

“I’ve been talking to Wanda, and she’s going to get you an appointment with her therapist. We’ll get you through this.”

“I don’t need a therapist, Mom.” Millie keeps her eyes fixed on mine, trying to make me feel guilty. It ain’t gonna work.

“We’ll talk about that when we get you home. Come on, darling, you don’t belong here.” Her mother urges her to stand up, leading her toward the door, and I hate the helpless look Millie gives me as she passes me.

I hate how comforting it felt having her in my arms when I woke up, and suddenly, I hate that they’re here to take her away from me.

I need to rid myself of any thoughts like that, immediately.

“I’m sorry about your brother.” Her dad clears his throat as I watch Millie get ushered out the door and down the path. “He was a good kid.” He taps my shoulder before following his wife and daughter, and I wait until he’s closed the door before I unleash all my rage. I swipe up the lamp from the side table, ripping it from the socket when I launch it at the door. I slam my boot into the coffee table, sliding it across the room before I lift it up and toss that too. Then, taking a chair from the kitchen, I slam it against the basin, over and over until the wood splits and it falls apart in my hands. I march into Corey’s room and rip the posters from his wall. I sweep everything off the top of his dresser onto the floor before crashing onto his bed and screaming into his pillow.

There’s a pain rooted inside me now. A hollowness that I know is gonna keep on growing, and when it all starts to get too much and I feel like I won’t catch my next breath, I smell a trace of her on his pillow, and somehow it makes that breath come just a little easier.

One Week Later

“Don’t you look handsome?” I follow the voice I hear to the door, where Alicia is standing in a black button-up dress that shows off her newly rounded figure perfectly.

“Didn’t think I’d be busting the suit out again so soon.” I smile sadly, lifting my chin so I can continue fiddling with my tie. “I ain’t ever been good with these damn things.” I shake my head and give up.

“Here, I gotcha. I used to have to do Saul’s for him all the time.” She steps up to me and untangles the mess I’ve made, and I can’t help staring at her while she fixes it. I’ve always appreciated the way Alicia looks, but it’s not until recently that I’ve found myself obsessing over it. It makes living here kinda awkward. Saul would be turning in his grave if he knew some of the thoughts that have gone through my mind about her lately. No doubt Alicia would be horrified too.

“There, much better.” She takes a step back to admire her handiwork and dusts off the lapels of my jacket.

“Good job.” I turn to look in the mirror and see she’s done a good job. It’s hardly surprising, Alicia puts her sole effort into everything she does.

“Oh my god!” she blurts out, looking down and touching her hand over the neat little bump she’s got poking out under that dress.

“Alicia, what is it?” I panic, wrapping my arm around her, just in case she falls. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” She's smiling when she looks up at me. “I just…I felt it move.” That smile stretches all the way to her eyes.

“The baby?” I check.

“Yeah.” Her head nods excitedly. “I’ve been feeling flutters for a while now, but nothing I could be certain of. But I’m sure now.” She quickly takes my wrist and guides my hand to rest on her lower stomach. “It’s doing it again. Can you feel it?”

There’s a long, awkward silence while we both wait for me to feel something, but as hard as I try, I’m not getting anything.

“I’m sorry.” Alicia laughs at herself as she releases me. “I got a little too excited. I shouldn’t have…You probably don?—”

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