Page 120 of Eternally Yours
“I can’t, Minnie. Just thinking about drinking fucks with my head. I tried, the other day I grabbed a beer in my hotel room after calling you, then I just sat there for an hour staring at it and feeling like shit.” He puts down his glass and rubs hisface.
“Silas, one glass isn’t going to get you drunk. And it’s not like you’re out there alone, you’re here with me.” I step up to him and place my hand on his biceps.
“I don’t want to risk it. What if I have a glass now and everything’s fine, so I end up having one while away and then another… no. I won’t take the chance in fucking up even more.” He shakes his head.
I let out a deep sigh, knowing I won’t be able to convince him on this. And I won’t admit that I’m happy about this, but I do feel it. I’m proud of him through it all. I bring my glass to the sink and pour it out.
“Baby, what are you doing!?” He tries to stop me, but it’s too late, it’s already down the drain.
“If you aren’t drinking, then I won’t either. At least not around you. If it’s what you need to feel better about everything, then I’ll support you through it.” I reach up and begin to wrap my arms around his neck as he lowers to wrap his around my body.
“Thank you,” he whispers into my ear and squeezes harder.
“We’re in this together.” My lips graze his neck, and then I press a feather-light kiss to the sensitive skin.
At first, I’m afraid it was too light for him to feel, but then his body instantly goes rigid in my grasp. I feel his heartbeat grow as well, and his erection that’s slowly pressing more and more into my stomach. I don’t let go, if anything, I press myself deeper into my husband, wanting to feel him.Needing to feel him.
His hand comes up to my hair and grabs a fistful as my head falls back on a moan, and I close my eyes.I miss his touch.When nothing else happens, I slowly open my eyes and find him staring at me with lust-filled eyes, but also fear.
His hold in my hair loosens, and he clears his throat, breaking eye contact and looking over to the oven. “The pizzas should be ready.”
He lets go of me completely and rises to his full height, stepping back. My hands fall from his neck and to my sides as I watch him retreat to the oven.Well, that didn’t go how I wanted.
Our dinner turns out pretty good for first-timers and the rest of the evening goes amazingly well too, but Silas doesn’t take the hint once, no matter how touchy I am. He always seems to have an excuse to move away. It’s beginning to bother me and make me feel a bit self-conscious.
After lying on the couch together and wiggling nonstop to get his attention, to which he decides at that moment that he needs to get a snack from the kitchen, I lose my patience.
“Do you not want me anymore?” I can’t help the shakiness in my voice, my eyes welling with tears at the thought that maybe my husband’s feelings have changed.
He stops abruptly and spins in my direction, eyes full of fire. He breathes hard but doesn’t say anything as he strides over to his phone on the coffee table, picking it up and tapping on it with violent fingers. But still, he doesn’t answer me. I feel the tears about to spill over the longer he makes me wait.
Suddenly he turns off the TV, ending the movie that was playing while the lighting in the room changes to a soft flow of colors, transitioning from one to the other. The sound system turns on, and ‘You are the Reason’by Calum Scott starts playing.
He turns to me and grabs my hand, yanking me up and taking me to the center of the living room. I’m too stunned to move, so he takes my hand and places it around his neck, keeping the other in his grasp. He places his free hand against my lower back, pulling me flush against him.
“Listen to the lyrics, Cecilia.”I don’t need to. I know the song.But he still gives me the time to hear them. “That’s how I feel about you. You are everything to me. There isno one,nothing, in this world that I want more than you.”
“Then why won’t you touch me?” I ask on a soft cry as the tears finally spill out.
He lets go of our clasped hands and brings his to cradle the side of my face, brushing the tears away as mine move to his chest. “Because I’m scared if I do, I won’t know how to stop. And I’m afraid you aren’t ready yet,” he whispers with his forehead resting against mine, his lips a hair’s length away from my own.
“I don’t want you to stop, Silas.” I pull him in and fuse my lips to his in a powerful kiss.
His arm encircles my waist and he hoists me up against his body, the other tangling into my hair. Teeth clanging against each other, tongues wrestling one another. It’s messy, sloppy, and frantic, but we need this.
“Please, Silas. I need you,” I breathe between kisses as we continue making love with our mouths.
He doesn’t grant me an answer, simply marches toward the stairs, taking them two at a time. Milo rushes behind us, but Silas kicks our bedroom door in his face before he has time to get in.
“Sorry, bud. Later,” he tells him and carries me to the bed.
He puts me down and climbs over me, never breaking our kiss. I’ve missed the taste of him and can’t get enough. We only break apart for the time it takes to remove my shirt and bra while I take off his, kissing in between each movement.
Silas gets to his knees and tugs my jeans off, and once they’re past my ankles, I riseand unbutton his pants. Grabbing them by the waist, I push them down along with his boxers. He goes to spread my legs and squeeze his wide torso between my thighs, but I stop him as I try to pull him up to me.
“No, Silas. I just want you. Now, please. I need to feel you.”
He doesn’t need more persuasion than that. He climbs up my body, settling between my thighs, and begins kissing me all over. There’s no need for foreplay, my body is already ready for him.
