Page 148 of Eternally Yours
She doesn’t make a face like I did while she swallows, then she whispers so only I can hear, “Cece, it tastes fine.”
I’m confused by why she feels the need to share it as a secret. I get it, apparently, I’m the only one who thinks it smells and tastes bad. I’m probably just too ti—
“Oh God!” It hits me like a freight train.
The exhaustion, the smell, the taste, the nausea.
I grab onto Aubrey’s arm and stare wide-eyed into her large brown ones. “OH MY GOD!”
Brey detaches my claws from her arm and takes my hands in hers. “It’s okay, just breathe. Everything is fine.”
“Sweetie? Are you okay?” Morg says, leaving her chair in a hurry to stand beside Aubrey.
At the same time, Emma leans over the island, trying to get a better look at my panicked expression. “Babe? What’s wrong?”
I can feel the blood drain from my face as pieces begin to click together. Why I’ve been more hormonal, why my boobs felt sore recently, but the biggest one clicks.I’m such an idiot!
“I haven’t had my shot since December. I was due in March, but with everything that happened, I never went to my appointment and didn’t reschedule another.” I’m staring straight ahead, my voice completely void of any emotion.
I’m trying not to freak out while my mind goes into overdrive. I don’t know how to feel about this. Silas and I are finally in a good place, I’m scared of what impact this could have on everything.
“I don’t understand?” Morgan says, followed by Emma’s, “What shot?” In the meantime, Aubrey still holds my hands, rubbing the surface soothingly.
“My birth control. I haven’t had it since December! And Silas and I never use protection!” Now I’m shouting, clearly losing my cool. I need to calm down before Silas hears us and comes running. Because I know I won’t be able to gain control of my emotions in front of him.
“Oh, shit!” Emma looks mortified when she finally understands what I’m trying to say.
“Oh my God! Are you saying you’re pregnant?” Morg places her hand on my shoulder, a twinkle lights up her eyes as she smiles with excitement.
“I think so... I’m not sure, but it’s the only thing that would explain everything.”
“When was your last period?” Aubrey asks with a calm voice. She’s the youngest out of us, and yet she’s always the one acting so composed. Morgan used to be like that too, until she met Emma. Now she’s a little wilder. I’m guessing the same will happen to Aubrey with time.
“Umm... end of May, I think. But I don’t always have my period, so it’s hard to keep track.” I try remembering if there was a time after that, but I come up empty.
“End of May!? Babe, that was like two months ago! It’s now the last weekend of July!” Em practically shouts, and I find myself looking over my shoulder to see if Silas shows up.
“Okay, okay. Let’s all calm down. No need to stress her out more. We don’t even know for sure. So, let’s take a moment to breathe, and then we can move forward. One step at a time.” Morg starts rubbing my back when my hands begin to shake in Aubrey’s.
“You’re right, everything would point to that. But before you start asking yourself a million questions, we should find out if you truly are or not. No point in stressing if it’s not the case. Here, I have a test in my bag. You can use it.” Morgan reaches into her purse and withdraws a pregnancy test, handing it over to me.
“Wait, why do you have one of these?” I look down at the box in my hands with a strange feeling running through me.
“Clay and I started trying for a baby. I keep one with me at all times, just in case.It’s still pretty new, and no one knows, so please keep it between us.” The smile she gives us is radiating with joy. “But enough about me. Go take it. Do you want one of us to come with you?”
“No, I think I can manage on my own...”
“We’ll be right here if you need us,” Aubrey says with a tender smile as she lets go of my hands so that I can stand.
I walk over to the bathroom on the main level, and with a bit of luck, I hadn’t peed this morning yet. So the urge is pretty intense right now. And from what I read quickly on the box, the first morning pee is the best one to use.
I pull my leggings down and sit on the toilet bowl, opening the box and taking the stick out of the wrapper. It’s one of those digital tests that will show‘Pregnant’or‘Not pregnant’. I pop off the cap, bring the stick between my legs, and pee on the indicated section, hitting my hand slightly before I correct my position.
I’ve never had to do this before, so I’m clearly no expert. I replace the cap, put it flat on the vanity beside me, and set my timer for three minutes. During that time, I wash my hands, then dry them. I brush my teeth and fix my ponytail in the mirror.
It takes extreme effort not to look at the blue and white stick on the side of the sink, but I manage to hold on until my timer goes off.
I take a deep breath, looking at myself in the mirror one last time. Wondering if I’m really ready to be a mom. If Silas is ready to be a dad. What life is going to be like with his career and a baby. Because deep down, I already know what that test is about to tell me. I can feel it in my bones.
