Page 23 of Twice Shy

“Exactly.”

“That’s possible,” she conceded. “Except you’re not a child and Ollie isn’t in Hollywood—he’s a guy you could ask out for that coffee.”

Joel bit his lip. “So, what are you saying?”

“I’m wondering whether you see in this young man some of the things that were missing in your relationship with Helen.”

“Like a cock?” He grimaced. “Ugh, sorry. That was— Sorry.”

“It’s alright,” Amy said. “This is difficult work. But it’s good, Joel. You’ve been in a holding pattern for a long time. This attraction you’re feeling, even if nothing comes of it, is a sign you’re emotionally ready to move on with your life.”

“But what if—?” His voice caught. “What if I’m not ready?”

Amy smiled, leaning forward in her seat to look him straight in the eye. “I think you are. That doesn’t mean it’ll be easy. Trusting someone in an intimate relationship when you’ve been betrayed and hurt is never going to be easy. But you have a lot to gain from trying.”

“And a lot to lose.” He’d never forget the utter shock of discovering that his own mind had betrayed him. For a guy who’d prided himself on his mental resilience to suddenly find himself unable to get up in the morning, unable to sleep, unable to work, had changed everything he believed about himself. It had taken him four years to put himself back together, and the man he was today bore only passing similarity to Joel Morgan: investment banker. And the cracks were still there, he could feel them deep in his foundations. The prospect of risking another collapse terrified him. He couldn’t survive it again.

In a gesture unusual for her, Amy reached out and patted his knee. “You’re stronger than you realize, Joel. You’re ready for this.”

His mouth felt dry. “I’m not so sure.”

“Invite him for coffee. Reach out, make a connection. Explore your attraction and think about how it makes you feel. It doesn’t have to go any further than that.”

“Just a coffee, huh?”

“Just a coffee.”

It sounded so simple and yet felt like walking off the edge of a cliff into thin air. And Joel wasn’t certain he dared take that step—not even for the charming Ollie Snow.