Page 38 of Twice Shy

“I’m happy to. I—” He shrugged, and Ollie noticed a little color rise in his cheeks. “If I went home, I’d just be cooking alone. It’s no trouble to cook for two, if you don’t mind the company.”

“I don’t mind the company. Although I’m not sureI’llbe such great company tonight. I’m shattered.”

“How’s the head? I got some Tylenol, if you need it.”

“I saw. Thanks. The head’s a little better, but—” He winced, and prodded at his ribs. “Yeah, I think I got some bruises coming up. The cop said I’d probably feel it over the next few days.”

Joel’s expression turned serious. “Are you sure you don’t need to see a doctor?”

“I’m sure.” He sighed, looking down at the floor. “I feel a lot worse about what happened at the school.”

He heard the muted clunk of a wooden utensil against a pan, the click of the burner being switched off. “You mean when you were upset?” Joel opened a cupboard door, closed it, and opened another. “Where do you keep your plates?”

“I mean how I spoke to Rory. Plates are here.” He pulled out a couple of dinner plates from the overhead cupboard—plain white, four for three dollars.

Joel took them. “There’s not a parent in the world who’s never lost their temper with their kids, Ollie. Not one.”

“It wasn’t even his fault. He hadn’t done anything wrong. I was just—”

“Stressed out? Distressed? In shock?”

Ollie’s lips curved into a smile that he didn’t really feel. “Not good enough, though, is it? Not when you have kids. You have to be better.”

Joel set the plates on the counter, turned to the stove and tipped a saucepan full of penne into the frying pan, stirring it into a fragrant tomato and bacon sauce. While he worked, he said, “You’re only human. A friend—well, actually she’s my therapist—once told me that trying to be perfect only ends in failure. All you need to be is good enough.” He looked over and smiled. He had such a nice smile. “And you’re more than good enough, Ollie.”

“Didn’t feel it today.”

“You’re allowed to make mistakes,” Joel said, handing him a loaded plate. “Kids understand mistakes. Come on, let’s eat.”

They sat at the glass dining table, Luis’s highchair pushed off to one side. It didn’t normally feel small when it was just Ollie and the kids, but Joel somehow took up more space. Not that he was especially large, more that Ollie was very aware of him: the proximity of their knees and elbows, the faint scent of his soap or shampoo, the unusual presence of another—a tall, masculine other—in his space. He liked it, he’d missed it, but wasn’t sure how to square it with the two small children sleeping in the room next door.

The meal Joel had made tasted fresh and flavorful and was exactly what Ollie needed. He made an appreciative noise when he took his first mouthful.

Joel watched him intently. “Good?”

“So good,” he said between mouthfuls. “I’m starving.”

Food eased his headache away and the Tylenol helped with the rest of his aches and pains. Joel had brought a couple beers, and it felt stupidly thrilling when he flipped off the lid and handed Ollie a bottle. This adult life was so at odds with the kid-centered existence he’d led for the past two years that he felt strangely at sea. Could he really still have this? A beer with a handsome guy, a guy who maybe wanted more than just a beer…?

“This is really great,” Ollie said, scraping up the last of his pasta. “You like to cook, huh?”

“I do. I find it relaxing.”

“Relaxing?” He laughed. “I hate cooking. I usually just finish off whatever the kids are eating.”

Joel gave him an old-fashioned look. “Figures.”

“Uh-oh, what does that mean?”

“Only that you take better care of the boys than you do of yourself.”

“Well, they need more taking care of, don’t they?”

Joel didn’t answer, setting down his beer instead. It left a damp circle of condensation on the glass table and Joel trailed his fingertip through it as he spoke. “I’ve left my car keys on the kitchen counter. You can borrow it for as long as you need.”

Ollie stared. “I can— What?”

“You can use my car until you’ve got things sorted out with your own. It’s no problem.”

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