Page 44 of Twice Shy

“I’m a punkin,” Luis told her.

She laughed. “You’re adorable, is what you are.” Her eyes flashed to Joel, bright and curious, but all she said was, “Enjoy the rest of your weekend.”

A little later, Ollie came back and between them they got all the left-over food packed away and carried back into the hall. The tables were stored in the PTA shed at the bottom of the sports field, so they needed to put them away soon because the afternoon was darkening fast under heavy clouds and there was no lighting down there.

“It won’t take long,” Ollie assured Joel when he voiced his concerns about them blundering about in the dark. “Rory and Luis are going home with Mateo and Elena for a play date, so I’ll be unencumbered for the rest of the afternoon. We’ll manage it between us.”

Joel tried not to react to the idea of Ollie being ‘unencumbered’, of having his undivided attention, but he could feel his cheeks heat and hoped Ollie didn’t notice in the dusky light.

While Ollie saw the kids off, Joel began cleaning the grill. Not a pleasant job, but he wasn’t one for mañana: future him would appreciate not having to clean the grill before the next event. He’d almost finished when Ollie hopped out of the school hall, jumping down the single step with a boyish smile. He looked different, energized. Free, Joel realized. He looked like a young man with a couple of hours to himself and it made Joel smile and his chest ache at the same time.

“What needs doing?” Ollie said, strolling over to the grill. “You made short work of that.”

“It needs to cool down a little more before we pack it away,” he said. “Let’s get the tables into the shed first.” The breakdown had started inside the hall, too, and people were bringing their folded-up tables outside, stacking them against the wall. They were heavy, but Joel and Ollie could manage a couple between them and started carrying them across the grass to the cluttered PTA shed until they had a pile on the grass outside.

“Jackie really needs to clear this place out,” Joel said, venturing inside.

Ollie followed cautiously. “What’s even in here?”

“About a decade’s worth of crap.” He directed Ollie’s attention to a freaky cut out of a clown with gaping red lips. “You were meant to throw water balloons into its mouth, but it gave half the kids nightmares. They only used it once.”

Ollie laughed—a low, sexy chuckle that made Joel feel warm all over. “Truly terrifying,” he confirmed.

What was in the other boxes and crates Joel didn’t know, possibly nobody knew. But a gloomy late November afternoon was not the time to find out. “The tables go over here,” he said. “If you start passing them in, I’ll stack.”

Between them, it didn’t take long. Which was lucky because the light was fading fast and the golden glow from the school didn’t reach them in the shed. Neither did the noise. Surrounded by rustling trees and the distant roar of the surf, a silence fell between them as they worked. Comfortable but weighted, expectant.

Joel was increasingly aware that this was the first time he and Ollie had really been alone. Even at his apartment, the kids had been steps away. But now it was just the two of them, Ollie lifting the tables into the shed, Joel sliding them along into a neat stack against the wall.

“That’s the last one,” Ollie said, breaking the charged silence as he stepped into the shed with the final table and helped Joel slide it into place. He dusted off his hands, pushing one through his tangled hair.

In the dim light, Joel saw the brief flash of his smile and a gleam of distant light in his eyes. He felt breathless, more than the minor exertion of stacking the tables warranted. “We just made it before we lost the light.”

“Yeah.” Ollie stood between him and the door, fidgeting on one leg. He pushed his hand through his hair again, and Joel flexed his fingers in memory of threading them through those silky curls. “Um, listen,” Ollie said, “I wanted to say thanks, again, for the loan of the car. It’s been a real lifesaver.”

“No problem.” That came out too gruff and Joel cleared his throat before he added, “You’ve found it okay to drive and charge and everything?”

“Yeah, easy. I, uh—” He tugged nervously at the cuffs of his coat. “I can’t keep it forever.”

“You can keep it as long as you need.”

“But that could be— Saving up for another car could take…” The words faded into a sigh as if there was no way to quantify how long it might take him to save up a few hundred bucks. Forever, perhaps.

Keep it, Joel wanted to say.Have it. I don’t need it. I’ll buy a new one.

He couldn’t say that, it would be ridiculous. But he had to say something. “We’ll share it. How about that? You need it for work, I don’t. If I need it at the weekend for a run into Commack, I’ll swing by and pick it up. Otherwise it’s just sitting on my driveway gathering dust.”

In the dark, Ollie’s eyes glistened. The silence deepened. At length, and in an unsteady voice, he said, “You’re just a very kind man, aren’t you?”

Try smitten.“Don’t give me too much credit. It’s no hardship to me, Ollie. Really.”

“But it’s everything to me. You can’t understand how much—” He cleared his throat and looked away, out the window. After a pause he said, “Maybe it hasn’t cost you much, but you’vesavedme.”

Joel watched the emotion playing over his face in concern. “I hope you don’t feel like you owe me anything, because you don’t. Nothing.”

“But I won’t forget this, Joel.” He turned back, those dark eyes luminous in the gloom. “I won’t ever forget this. And I hope, one day, I’ll be able to do the same for someone else. Because when you’re struggling, and someone is kind and generous, it feels like a fucking miracle and I—” He rubbed the heel of his hand over his eyes. “Shit, sorry. I promised myself I wouldn’t do this.”

And I promised myself I wouldn’t dothis.

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