Page 45 of Persuaded

“Yeah, I’m good.” He cleared his throat. “Where’s Matt?”

“Sleeping. Dude, it’s past midnight.” He ducked to look in at Joshua. “You coming in?”

Joshua shook his head and got out of the car on shaking legs. “I’ll go home, unless”—he glanced at Finn—“you’d like me to talk to Matt?”

But Finn didn’t look at him. “Like I said, that’s on me.”

Whatever had happened between them in the car, whatever wild frenzy had taken Finn, it seemed to be over. Joshua felt dizzy, lost. “Okay, then. I’ll—I’ll head home. Could you call when you’ve got news about Liz?” This, he directed to Sean.

“Sure. And thanks, man. God knows what we’d have done without you tonight.”

He waved that away and tossed Sean the keys to his car. “Just let me know if I can help at all.”

With a parting nod, Sean shepherded Finn into the house and Joshua waited for him to look back before the front door closed.

He didn’t.

Chapter Twelve

The days between Christmas and New Year’s were short and bleak.

Sean texted a couple times with updates on Liz: she’d suffered a subdural hematoma; the surgery worked; she was out of danger; her mom had arrived to look after Matt; Liz should be home in a week.

Thank God.

Objectively, Joshua knew the news came as a relief. But he didn’t feel a lifting of weight from his shoulders. That night, that horrible night on the beach, he’d felt an echo of the connection he’d once shared with Finn, and their intense, confusing encounter in the car afterwards had only made it harder than ever to let go of the dream. He mooched about his house for a couple days, waited for a call from Finn that never came, and played too much Chopin. By the twenty-seventh he’d had enough of his own company and headed down to Dee’s even though he didn’t have a shift. He wanted to check up on Ali, anyway; he hoped she didn’t still blame herself for the accident.

When he got there he found her behind the counter, a little wan but smiling, and the coffee shop empty of customers. “Newt,” she said, and hugged him hello.

They talked about Liz, and Ali looked shamefaced and swore she’d never drink again. After a while, Lexa emerged from the kitchen to slump disconsolately at the counter. “It’s all over the news, you know.”

Joshua frowned. “What is? Liz’s accident?” It sounded unlikely.

“Her and Finn.” Lexa rolled her eyes. “Hero actor saving his fiancée.”

“Oh.” Joshua’s stomach clenched, a sharp narrowing sensation. “They’re—Are they really engaged, then?”

Lexa shrugged and pulled out her phone. By “all over the news” she meant a couple of entertainment websites showing paparazzi pictures of Finn heading in and out of St. Theresa’s, beneath headlines about how Finn Callaghan “saved the small-town girl he loves.”

“I guess it makes a good story,” Lexa grumbled. “But, honestly? Liz is way too soccer-mom for Finn, don’t you think?”

“Lexa!” Ali objected. “They’re in love.”

“C’mon, Newt, you know what I mean.” She lifted a teasing eyebrow. “Finn’s hot. Too hot for a small-town schoolteacher, am I right?”

He knew that if she’d suspected his feelings for Finn she wouldn’t tease him, so it was easy to pass off the comment with a roll of his eyes. “I assume you think a small-town barista is more his style?”

She winked. “You talking about you or me, buddy?”

Despite his best intentions, his cheeks flushed. “Just make me a flat white, will you? I’m a paying customer today.”

“Well, I think it’s beautiful,” Ali said. “Hey, maybe he’ll fly Liz and Matt out to LA when he heads back there. Maybe they’ll move there. Can you imagine?”

Joshua stared at the counter, tried not to remember him and Finn planning that very thing as they lazed in the sand dunes together. Instead, he forced himself to remember Finn’s anguish that night on the beach, holding Liz in his arms. That he’d turned to Joshua later, for comfort in his fear and grief, proved nothing—did it? No, because if it had meant anything more, Finn wouldhave called. “He seems to care about her,” he said, and tried to make himself believe it. “I hope—I hope it works out.”

“And what about you, Newt?” Lexa slid his coffee over the counter and refused to take his money.

He blinked, eyes prickling, and breathed around the knot in his throat. “What about me?”