Page 51 of Replay
Their voices start to fade away as they head back to practice. Sam grips my arm.
“Don’t listen to them,” she whispers. “You trust Hawke and that man is so gone for you. Tell him, talk to him, but do not let those guys get in your head.”
I know she’s talking from experience. It's part of the reason her andhe-who-should-not-be-namedhad some of their issues before she came here and left him behind. Still, it stings to know that his teammates are so worried about him and that being in a relationship is detrimental to his game. It hurts, but I know if I tell Hawke about it, he’s going to flip out.
Quietly, we sneak out of the practice field and hustle over to the arena where we have our own practice before our away game tomorrow night. I’m in my own head while getting dressed, my mind preoccupied by the conversation and the hits Hawke was taking at practice. Riley and Sam do their best to pull me into a conversation and to keep me in the present. Isla even comes by and offers her silent support, giving my arm a squeeze.
“I’m working on something,” she murmurs, so low that only I hear her. With a nod of my head, she smirks and saunters over to her own locker to get ready. If Isla is working on something, I trust her.
On the ice, I go through all the drills and warm ups our coach wants us to do. I push my legs until they burn, even though my heart is not in it today. I don’t know what else I can do to prove that I’m not going to be Hawke’s downfall. I believe in him and his dream. He’s never made me feel that I’m a problem while we’ve been together; it's quite the opposite. He tells me over and over that without me his game would go to shit. Without me he wouldn’t have the ambition to play because his dream is only complete if I’m there too.
Sam is right; I need to trust Hawke. He hasn’t given me reasons not to. The way he dealt with Jax could have been different, but in the end, it brought us together again. Hawke knew me well enough to know that I couldn’t have stayed withJax. I wouldn't have dated him even if Jax told me the truth right away. Hawke has bared his soul about our past and apologized over and over about leaving the way he had to. Maybe the aftermath of prom would have been different if I had kept my promise to go to Texas. We’ll never know, but Hawke doesn’t blame me. He waited for me. He held us together from afar, even while I was trying to piece myself together without him. Not that it helped because I’ve always been missing my most vital piece, my heart. It's been with Hawke the entire time.
“Hey Emma.” Sophia skates over to me. We’ve been fine since the altercation over a month ago, but I do keep my guard up with most of my teammates now. I keep it professional and just about hockey. “How is Sheppard doing?”
“His leg is good. I think he’s ready to take on their opponent next weekend.” I shrug and push the puck along the ice with my stick.
“That's good. It was a nasty hit. I can’t believe Newbury was such a shitty human being.” Carson glides next to us suddenly. My posture stiffens slightly, and I roll back my shoulders, not wanting to get in any arguments.
“Look Lawson, I wanted to apologize about what I said about you and Sheppard. I think I just had some misplaced notion about how one of our guy players was hurt. I didn’t have the whole story and I shouldn’t have judged you,” Carson says, and I watch her face for any detection of lies. There is nothing but sincerity there and I let my guard down a little.
“Thanks, Cars.” I nudge my favorite goalie. “That means a lot.”
“Now that the kumbaya is out of the way,” Sophia intervenes and right then Isla skates up to us and hands her a piece of paper. “The game tomorrow.”
My teeth grit together. “Against Weston, what about it?”
“So the girlfriend of the football player who hurt Sheppard plays on the team.” Sophia glances at the paper that Isla gave her.
“Number fifty-four. MaKenna Oberstein.” Isla’s gaze meets mine, and I see the flash of cold determination in hers. That protectiveness she always talks about rises to the surface and I watch her face while she wrangles whatever darkness is inside her back down. Red flag, maybe. I see it as the biggest green flag around. I recognize the need to protect your friends at all costs.
My eyes land on each of them and I nod my head in understanding and gratitude. “Thank you.”
We all skate off in different directions for our next drills. I keep the information to myself while a plan forms in mind. I never actually saw the piece of paper, but I know that it’s for my own protection as well. My team is rallying behind me, supporting me. And now I have the chance to prove that I’m all in for Hawke, and that no one messes with what’s mine.
I’ve been on edge all day, preparing for tonight’s game. Even though I acted normal with Hawke, making sure he was comfortable, that he was doing better after his practice and made him dinner and stuck it in the fridge, he was eyeing me skeptically as I was leaving.
“You sure you aren’t mad I can’t make it to your game?” he asks again, propping his shoulder against the wall by the entryway while I slip on my shoes.
“No. I knew you wouldn’t be able to. You guys have video to watch tonight for your big home game. You’ll make it to one of mine at some point, QB, I’m not worried.” I smile at him, trying to reassure him.
“I’ll be done around the same time as your game. I’ll meet you outside the arena,” he offers and I shake my head.
“Absolutely not. It's supposed to snow tonight, just a dusting but that means the temps are dropping. You can’t get sick, Hawke. You need to play next week.”
He sighs and runs his hands over his face. “You’re coming home right after though, right?”
I nod and stand to my feet, bouncing over to him and wrapping my arms around his neck. “I’ll be here, and I’ll tell you all about how we beat their asses.”
“I like the confidence, sugar.” Hawke smirks and wraps his arms around my waist giving me a hug.
“I learn from the best,” I remind him before leaning in and kissing his lips. Hawke groans and pulls my body tighter against him. “Not enough time, Hawke!”
I giggle when he frowns and reluctantly lets me go before stepping back and readjusting his dick in his pants, looking thoroughly disappointed. And that's how I leave him, stepping out of the apartment with my one priority for the night. Revenge.
The locker room is humming with excitement and the prospect of violence. Riley and Sam know what Isla found as well and their quiet support for me proves how strong our friendships run. I barely pay attention to the amped up music or the conversation around me. I tune out the majority of our coaches’ pregame speech because all I can think about is my plan to destroy number fifty-four and get away with it. Checking is prohibited in the women's hockey league, why I do not know. We wear the same protective equipment as men do, so it's never made any sense to me. I googled it once but even that answer wasn’t enough to justify the rule of the game. In order to get to fifty-four, I’m going to need to be sneaky; it's going to have to look unintentional. My team is prepared for me to draw the penalty, knowing once we do I’ll be in the box for a few minutes,which leaves us short on the ice. I have their blessing and I don’t intend to squander it.
“Lawson,” my coach snaps and my head jerks up. “Did you hear what I just said?”
