Page 186 of Something Rad
It’s not like that with Cooper.
I don’t want her like that.
She doesn’t mean what you think she means to me.
She doesn’t do anything for me.
I don’t even want her for that.
All things I said. All things I mean. But I just know Alice doesn’t understand thewaythat I mean them. And I understand why. I know the reputation I’ve had. I know what’s been expected of me. And it’s exactly what I’m sure Alice is thinking. That I’m the player of the Bay View High. That I’m the spoiled rich jock with the best hair in the school and zero need to stick to one woman. Because they all want me. I’m not the guy that dates the girl who isMost Likely to Succeed. I’m the jerk that says shit like…
If I wanted sex, I could get that from any girl in this schoolright now.
That one, I have no explanation for. No excuse.
Because it’s true. And it just came out. And if Cooper heard me say that after what went down with us after Denise’s holiday party…well, I’d probably have a really hard time talking my way out of that. Because there’s no way to. All I can do is tell her that, regardless if that’s the truth or not, it doesn’t matter. Because even if every girl in this school really does want me…there’s only one I care to give myself to.
I just need to get her to listen to me.
I don’t know what to say though. Where to begin. What will get her to hear me out.
“Don’t listen to Alice,” I beg her.
The look Cooper’s face molds into tells me that was definitely not the right thing to say.
“What?” she asks, tearing her hand away from my grasp.
Shit.
Please, just listen.
“Cooper, she–”
“Robbie Summers!Please make your way back to the stage.”
My words get caught in my throat.
“Mr. Summers?” Principal Whileyman calls again. He must spot me on the side of the stage, because he adds, “Ah, there you are. Get up here, son!”
I shake my head. “Cooper–”
“You’re needed on stage,” she says, her tone clipped. “And I have to take your picture.”
She turns on her heel and walks away.
“Dammit!” I grunt under my breath, biting down hard on my knuckles as I watch Cooper walk straight over to where Alice is still standing. Where she’s clearly waiting to finish their conversation from earlier. The conversation I just thought I was able to successfully intercept before it ever happened. Cooper takes her spot in front of the photo booth, and, even though she’s trying to be subtle about it, lowering her head and talking out of the side of her mouth, I can see her speaking to Alice. I just know she’s asking her about what just went down. I also know I’m screwed.
I force myself up the steps and onto the stage just as Principal Whileyman is calling my name for a third time. I walk up to the podium and shake my head. He’s saying things to me, but I’m not listening to a word. My eyes are glued to Cooper and Alice. I’m watching as every word that comes out of Alice’s mouth makes Cooper’s eyebrows bunch further together and her face turn redder. It feels like a punch to my gut.
Principal Whileyman places a sash over my head and motions for me to go stand by the backdrop in front of Cooper. It feels like the world moves in slow motion as I make my way over there, as I watch her avoid my eye contact as I approach, as I get to see the slump of her shoulders and the hard set of her jaw as I take my place.
I’m treading water. I’m on the verge of drowning. I don’t have any idea how I’m going to dig myself out of this situation with her. This was certainly not the way I envisioned our first day back at school together, the first day of us making it through Cooper’s mandated two week rest period. The one that she put in place so she could determine if what we had was real, if she could actually trust me. She never said those words exactly, but I knew it. I saw it in her eyes. As much as she wanted to trust me, she had to keep herself safe. I can’t say I blame her. Especially not now. Butfuck. This is so messed up.How did it get so messed up?I’m not sure that this could possibly get worse.
“And for the ladies, yourBest All-Aroundfor the class of 1988 is…Denise Davis!”
My spine steels. My and Cooper’s gazes instantly snap to one another, and I see it, on full display, how absolutely done she is.
Fuck. Me.
