Page 202 of Something Rad
I pull away from the gas station, heading in the opposite direction of my home and towards Billy Montgomery’s house. Towards the kickback with the guys he invited me to during practice with the promise of bottomless beers to get me out of whatever ‘slump’ I’ve been in and back in ‘the game’.
A voice in my head had told me to turn him down when he asked, and I listened to it then. But now, I’m realizing that it was the voice of a ghost. The voice of a girl that’s no longer in my life and won’t be coming back. A voice I’ve been holding on to as much as I’ve been pushing it away.
I’m not sure when exactly I let her go, but she’s quiet now. And I take that as my sign.
Time to let the past be the past and to come back to the present. To the place I’ve always been the most comfortable. To the place where I thrive.
To the only place I’ve ever really belonged.
forty-three
SARA
I just finish hanging the last sparkly green four-leaf clover garland when I hear the front door bell chime.
“Welcome to Groovy Movie,” I say, spinning around. “Can I help you find anything–Oh.Hey, Alice.”
Alice marches right up to the check-out counter, putting her hands on her hips. “Sara, what are you doing?”
“Uh…” I mutter, glancing at the garlands behind me. “Decorating for Saint Patrick’s Day?”
“No,” Alice shakes her head. “I mean, what are youdoing?”
I cross my arms, tilting my head at her. “What do you mean? I’m working.”
“It’s Saturday night.”
“I always work on Saturday night.”
“Yes, I know,” Alice says, shaking her head. “But, Sara, for nearly the last two months, you’ve been workingeverynight.”
“And what’s wrong with that?” I question her.
“You doing absolutely nothing else besides it.”
I scrunch my eyebrows at her. “I do lots of other things.”
“Really?” Alice questions me. “Like what?”
“Well, I–”
“Something that doesn’t involve volunteering at the library, student government duties, the yearbook, the school newspaper, or school at all for that matter,” Alice says, giving me a knowing look.
My mouth snaps shut.
“That’s what I thought,” Alice sighs. “Sara, we gotta get you out.”
I turn away from her, fiddling with some papers on the counter. “What is this ‘out’ you speak of? And why do I need to go there?”
Alice moves around the side of the counter to stand in front of me. “It was something you were finally learning about and experiencing. But then Rob–”
“Don’t.” I cut her off, my gaze snapping up to her.
She holds her hands up defensively, rolling her eyes. “I’m just saying, Sara, it’s our senior year. We have just about two months left. You can’t just spend your every free moment throwing yourself into work or waiting at home by the mailbox for your scholarship application response to come in.”
“Ouch,” I scoff under my breath.
“Hey,” Alice says, her voice gentler. “I’m only saying what you’ve said before. It’s out of your hands now. You either got it or you didn’t. You spending the remainder of your final year of high school as a hermit won’t increase your chances of going to NYU at this point.”
