Page 56 of Trophy
She swung the door open when she saw it was Rob on her front stoop, his face twisted slightly as if he were feeling something strong. “What’s the matter?” she asked, stepping out of the way to let him inside.
He stepped in. “I’m sorry to just come over like this. I can’t help feeling like something was… wrong between us before.”
She knew exactly what he was talking about. He’d recognized when she’d withdrawn emotionally because she was so disappointed about his not opening up to her about Dee. Shewas rather embarrassed about her reaction now, so she tried to downplay it. “Nothing was wrong, Rob. I’m just tired.”
To prove she wasn’t upset, she ushered him into the dining room, where they both sat down in the chairs at the card table where she had all her jewelry materials spread out.
He drew his brows together, his eyes never leaving her face. “Are you sure? I’m really sorry about that whole thing with Dee. I don’t want her to get in between us.”
“It’s not that. It’s not her.”
“Then what is it?”
She felt vulnerable and exposed with his eyes on her so intently. She dropped her gaze to stare down at a little tin of shiny beads. “It’s…” She’d been about to say it was nothing, but she stopped the words before they came out.
She wanted Rob to be honest with her, so she needed to be honest with him. “I… I’d like you to be able to tell me things about her, about how you feel, and I was just a little… disappointed when you didn’t earlier. But it’s really not a major issue.”
She darted her eyes up to see his expression, and she saw a brief flicker of both recognition and anxiety on his face before he gave her a little smile. “Okay. I get it. But there’s really not much to tell.”
“I think there is.” She was nervous about saying even that much, and she knew he felt pressured when she saw his reaction.
He cleared his throat. “Well, we’re not even dating so that other people know about us. How much soul-searching do you really expect?”
He was trying to play the question off as casual, almost teasing, but she wasn’t deceived. He meant it. And she suddenly felt angry and incredibly guilty—both at the same time.
Despite what he kept telling her, he wasn’t happy with the way things were between them.
“So you’re not okay with still taking things slow?” she asked, trying not to sound as emotional as she felt.
“I’m okay if that’s what you need.” He was saying the words but didn’t look like he meant them. And she knew it for sure when he continued, “But it’s been more than a month now. Why are you so afraid to even go on a date with me?”
Now she felt defensive on top of everything else, like he’d caught her doing something wrong. “I went with you tonight.”
“After I assured you it wasn’t really a date.”
“So all this time you’ve been... annoyed that I wanted to take things slow?”
“No, I haven’t been annoyed. I understood. But I would have hoped by now we could...” He trailed off, as if he’d just realized what he was saying.
“I thought we were making progress,” she said, her voice rather raspy as she fought back a few tears. “All I’ve ever been was a trophy wife. I’ve never been in any other kind of relationship. I… I wanted to make sure it was… right before we went to the next step. But I thought we really were making progress.”
Rob reached out to put a hand on her arm. “We were making progress. We are. I’m sorry I brought this up at all. I haven’t been unhappy.”
“But you want us to go public with this?”
His mouth tightened and he glanced away. “Well, yeah. Is that so unusual? To want everyone else to know we’re together? To know that we’re not just… playing around?”
She was absolutely horrified at the idea that he believed she might just be playing around with him, that he might think she was like his ex-wives and only using him for what she needed. She was still terrified that they didn’t really have enough of a foundation for a real relationship—that she wasn’t the kind ofwoman Rob was really looking for—but she couldn’t let him believe she was just stringing him along.
“Okay,” she said, almost choking on the word. “Okay.”
He straightened up. “Okay what?”
“We can go out. On a date.”
“So… you’re ready?”
“Y-yeah. I think so.”
