Page 49 of His Ruined Duchess

“I am so terribly sorry, Magnus. I did not seek to offend you at all. The Duke and I…there is tension there. However, I can assure you that I am notinvolvedwith him. I wouldnever?—”

“Selina,” Magnus interrupted her tirade of self-flagellation, “I am not upset. If I am being quite frank, I do not care. It isn’tuncommon for there to be interest outside a match such as ours, and you were discreet, trust me.”

If Magnus had intended to soothe her, it’d backfired. Selina felt all the more embarrassed and guilty. He insisted that she’d been discreet, but still, he’d noticed. Surely, Magnus had not noticed everything—it was much more likely that he’d be upset—but it did not change the fact that he’d picked up on her tumultuous feelings toward Hugh.

“Let me ask you this, and I request an earnest answer for an earnest question.”

Selina swallowed hard but nodded. “Very well.”

Magnus met her eyes without blinking, expressionless and unflinching. “Do you wish to marry the Duke?”

“That wouldneverhappen.” The words were out of her mouth before she could stop them or school her tone.

Magnus smirked, shaking his head. “That might be the case, but it does not answer my question. Do youwantto marry him?”

“I…” Selina’s throat felt tight, fire burning at the corners of her eyes as if the oxygen was being depleted. “No. I… will not marry the Duke.”

The words were like daggers in her mind and ribcage, and still, Selina had not fully answered Magnus. She hoped that he wouldnot press further. She had stated that shewould notmarry him, and that was as sure a reality as the sound of her mother’s snoring only a few feet behind her. Asking her to vocalize that she didn’twant towas too much for her.

Magnus sighed, bobbing his head in several nods, but he scooted further away on the settee and then turned to her with an unbothered expression. While she expected to see falsehood behind it, Selina couldn’t. Magnus truly seemed unaffected by her confession. Hedidn’tcare, and that was something of note.

“Selina, I should not care if you saw him once our arrangement was complete. I have little emotional stock in this marriage, and I know you feel the same. This is a means to an end between us and should it alleviate some of your discomfort. I wish for you to know that if you were to have a lover during our marriage, that would be fine. As long as it remained discreet of course.”

She was at a loss for words, her mouth dropping open slightly. While it wasn’t unheard of, it did surprise her that Magnus was so openly discussing the potential for affairs in their relationship with her. It was clear he harbored no romantic feelings toward her, and that, similar to how Selina felt, this entire courting process had been done only to maintain appearances.

“Honestly, I may indeed do the same. There is no reason why we both cannot be happy and engaged in this arrangement for the sake of Kitty and your family.”

“I… You truly do not mind the notion of me having a lover during our marriage?”

Magnus smiled—genuinely. “Not in the slightest.”

Selina’s mind and heart danced around each other in a swirling mess of emotions and thoughts. She’d not considered this possibility before. While a part of her wanted to be slightly upset that Magnus did not see anything of interest in her, Selina had to admit that she was much more glad about what he’d said.

Regardless of whether she did, in fact, take up a lover or if that lover was Hugh, Magnus would steer away from her, not expecting her to fulfill her wifely duties. That had been a dream of hers since the beginning, and it eased her soul to know that he would not be looking to claim her virtue once they wed.

The room fell into silence once more, and Selina felt oddly relieved. This conversation had done nothing to resolve the tension with Hugh. Still, it did provide a layer of comfort for Selina’s other most significant concern.

Now, of course, there is just one problem in my life. And as is so often the case lately, it remains the Duke.

Chapter Twenty-Three

Magnus had excused himself sometime later, after staying for tea for a reasonable period. Selina’s mother had awoken with a start as the door to the drawer room opened, and she had to hold back a chuckle at the way the woman handled the surprise. Still, they said their goodbyes to Magnus, and then Selina and her mother sat together on the settee.

“Well, I do apologize. I don’t know what came over me. But I trust that the afternoon went as swimmingly as all the others. I am so glad that this fortuitous match arose. And from one of your close friends at that!”

“Yes, it is quite something, isn’t it?” Selina’s tone was flat as she answered, and she was forced to admit, at least to herself, that she was still very distracted by what Magnus had said. In fact, she wasexceedinglytorn about what she might do in the future.

Was taking a lover something she wanted? The idea of seeing someone clandestinely didn’t hold the thrill it might have whenshe was younger and had not been forced to carry the weight of her current secrets.

“Dearest.” Her mother’s voice pulled Selina from her thoughts, and she lifted her head to give her a smile. “Are you all right? I have not seen you so distracted as this in some time. And it worries me.”

Selina was shocked that her mother had noticed as much. She was usually far too busy gossiping and carrying on about how she must marry her daughters well. The emotional state of any one of her children had long been thought to be of only a mild concern to Bridget. And unfortunately for Selina, this line of questioning only made her feel worse.

“I-I apologize, Mother. I am only thinking about my future. I have been married once, and I recall every moment of my time with Easton. He was a kind man, but he…”

The words were right there on the tip of Selina’s tongue. Was she really going to say this to her mother, and now of all times? But that was the thing of it. Selina was about to enter into another loveless marriage, and it plagued her in a way that made her feel hopeless and vulnerable.

“He did not love me, not romantically, at least. We were companions, yes, but it never stretched beyond that, and now-now, I feel that I am entering into the same situation as before with Magnus. He has admitted that…” Her mouth felt dry, and she had to look away from her mother and down at her fingers to continue. “… it would be acceptable for me to have a loveroutside our marriage… that he is considering doing the same. Magnus is not interested in growing to love me or father any children.”

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