Page 102 of The Fae Girl 1

Everyone in the castle knew that something had happened between me and Rillon. And that I was responsible for his and the High Queen’s banishment. I didn’t know how they felt, if they were angry at me, or whether they realised I was a victim in all this.

But the whispers followed me. As much as I tried to ignore them. As much as I tried to block them out.

Perhaps that was why I hid away. That was what I said to justify it. Because I was back to being cowardly Alice again.

Fearful Alice.

Pathetic Alice.

Mira had somehow acquired her own stringlet and we spent hours playing one sad tune after another. None of us spoke about it, none of us seemed to want to even think about it.

“Enough.” Nela said breaking the sad lilt I’d played almost continuously for the last hour.

I looked up, my hands faltering on the strings.

“You need to stop wallowing.” She said.

“I’m not wallowing. I’m…” I started to say.

“Yes you are.” Nela interrupted me. “When what you should be doing is fighting back.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean channel that anger. Channel all that emotion and make yourself stronger, tougher from it.”

“And how exactly do I do that?” I half snapped.

Iwasangry. Iwasfurious. But I also felt so incredibly vulnerable. How could I make myself tougher when even my magic wasn’t helping? When I’d needed it the most I had nothing, for all Jelric going on about how powerful I was. I didn’t feel powerful. I felt weak. Weak and vulnerable and pathetic and that’s where half of my anger came from too. Not just at what had happened, not just at what Rillon had done or attempted to do, but in reality what could I even do to protect myself and stop someone else trying the same thing?

When it came down to it I was just as defenceless as I had been back at the school. Poor defenceless, pathetic Alice.

“I want to train you.” Nela replied.

“What?”

“I want to train you.” She said again.

“But you’re not Magi.”

Nela gave a little chuckle. “Not in magic. In fighting, so you can defend yourself.”

“Doesn’t it take years to train to be a soldier?” I asked.

“It does. But that’s not what we’d be doing. You’re not joining the army Alice. I’m not going to train you for battle. But I’ll show you how to fight one on one. I’ll teach you how you can actually protect yourself without the need for magic or for guards or soldiers or anyone else. That is, if you want to?”

I nodded, even before I properly thought it through. If I couldn’t depend on my magic maybe I could learn to protect myself with just my fists.

“Wait, what will the High Prince say? Surely he won’t allow that?”

I swear I saw her smirk. “Do you care what he thinks?”

“No.” I said quickly. “When do we start?”

“Now.” Nela said getting up.

“Now?” I repeated.

“Got better plans we don’t know about?” She asked.

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