Page 21 of Uprising

I let out a sigh, swallowing the lump in my throat.

“It’s time.” My mother says, handing me the bouquet, all but ramming it into my hands.

My heart sinks further as I realise she’s right. I can’t put this off any longer.

We walk down together with the bridesmaids chattering merrily as they walk ahead.

At the very bottom of the stairs my father is there, just like the last time I was in this situation. He runs his eyes over me before holding out his arm for me to take.

I can’t do it. I can’t play this part.

So I walk past him, towards the waiting car.

Only he grabs me back snarling. “You don’t learn do you?” He says.

I can feel it, my body trembling, my heart fluttering more rapidly. More panicked. I hate that he’s touching me right now. I hate that today is going to be everything he’s dreamed of; all his ambition coming to life.

He takes me out to the car. I clamber in and once he’s seated we sit in stony silence the entire way, down the streets, down past all the masses of faces that are out staring at us, waving, throwing roses.

By the time we get to the Cathedral I’m shaking so much I can’t stop my hands from moving. My father stares at them then at my face with that hard look on his.

And I see it, that warning.

That message in his eyes that he will hurt me, that he will hurt Lara, if I fuck this up.

The door opens, he walks around holding his arm out as the crowd cheers so loudly. I don’t hesitate then, I take his arm and we walk up the stairs that now feel like a mountainside and into the hushed silence beyond.

There must be over a thousand people in this building. Over a thousand sets of eyes that snap to me.

Someone crouches down at my feet, rearranging my dress making sure I am the picture perfect bride everyone expects and then that god awful lilt begins.

I can smell the flowers that fill the space, I can hear the sniffles of people. My footsteps seem to echo so loudly, above the music that’s playing so merrily.

I look ahead and I can see him, stood at the very end. He’s smiling.

Roman.

My heart lifts, for a second I want to pull myself free, to kick off my heels and run down the aisle, tossing the flowers and to throw myself into his arms.

But then I blink and it’s not him.

It’s not him at all.

He’s dead. He’s gone. I’m all alone now.

Roman’s face changes, his beautiful features mar into those of Darius’s. Those soft lips become chapped. That stubble becomes clean shaven, and those eyes, Roman’s dark eyes turn pale watery blue.

I wince, my breath hitches again, thank god the veil is covering my face because I need it now, I need every little bit of help I can to get down this aisle.

My father sets a quicker pace. I know he can tell that I’m too jittery. I know he knows that I want to run, to scream, to escape so badly. But we both know too that that’s not an option.

The bridesmaids walk behind me in a way that feels like they too are guards, bringing up the rear, ensuring I make progress, ensuring I cannot get away.

By the time I’m halfway up the aisle I swear the music has finished and it has to be repeated.

Why is this aisle so long? Why is this Cathedral so long?

Darius stands there, his eyes fixed on me as if he can will me to his side.

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