Page 130 of Downfall

He nods. “I’ll make sure of it. They won’t win this time around.”

I feel the tears dropping. It’s silly to be crying like this but I can’t stop it. They’ve taken so much, from me, from us, from our daughter too.

I brush them away quickly but he still sees.

He sweeps my hair back, tucks it behind my ear. “She looks so much like you.” He says.

“She has your face.” I reply.

“And your freckles.” He grins.

I smile back as my heart seems to melt with the look on his face. The way he’s talking about our daughter.

“Promise me something.” He murmurs.

“What?”

“Promise me no more secrets. From now on we’re completely honest with each other. We don’t hide anything. We always know what the other is thinking, is feeling. We confide in each other. We trust that we have each other’s back.”

“Okay.” I whisper.

He kisses me lightly. Before I can register it he’s pulled away but the ghost of where his lips pressed against mine still linger.

“It’s been a long day. We should get some sleep.” He says.

I swallow, nodding. He’s right. It’s been emotionally exhausting.

I follow him up to where my room is, as he holds the door open I wonder for a moment if he’s going to stay here but, just as I turn, he shuts the door quietly leaving me alone.

For a while I pace. Though I’m exhausted I can’t seem to switch off. I wash my face, brush my hair with the one left in the bathroom and pull on what I’m assuming is one of Sofia’s T-shirts to sleep in.

As I clamber into the bed I realise this is the last place I want to be so I scoop up the duvet, wrapping it around me and sneak out into the corridor. I’m on the floor below Lara’s. I take each step feeling like I’m doing something naughty. Something forbidden.

When I get to her room the man guarding it just nods, like he expected me almost.

I sneak in, shutting the door behind me quickly so the light doesn’t disturb her and, as I creep up to her bed and make myself comfortable on the floor, I freeze.

Roman is here, the other side, watching me.

“I couldn’t sleep.” I whisper feeling like I need an explanation, a reason to be here. Some sort of justification to stop him from throwing me out.

He just smiles glancing back at Lara. “Me neither.”

I lean back against the wall. It’s cool in here with the aircon blasting and I wrap the duvet around me. He doesn’t move. He just sits there the other side for a few moments.

And then he gets up, walks around the bed and for a minute I think he will tell me to go now. To leave. Only he doesn’t, he sits down beside me.

I watch him warily. I’m nervous, unsure what to say. What to do.

I can hear his breathing. It’s soft. Low against the soft hum of the AC.

I look back at our daughter who’s somehow still sound asleep. I guess I’m grateful that so far, despite what she’s been through, she doesn’t seem to be having nightmares about it.

“Where was she?” I ask quietly.

“In a house by Charters.”

I nod. I guess that makes sense. It’s walking distance from there to the park. If I’d been smarter perhaps I could have followed them back, seen where they were keeping her and rescued her that way. I shake my head slightly, knowing that’s nonsense.

---