Page 43 of Downfall

“I’m fine.” My voice cracks betraying me.

His hand moves to rest on my thigh. “Why are you so nervous?”

I shut my eyes, the heat flushing to my face. I wish I wasn’t always the insecure one. I wish I wasn’t always the inexperienced one. It’s okay for Roman, he’s done this before, but for me, everything has been the first time, the first kiss, the first touch, the first blowjob, all of it.

“Nothing’s going to happen unless you want it to. You’re in charge.” He says quietly.

I give him a smile. He’s always said that, always made that clear, even the first time he touched me, when I was recklessly making moves on a man I knew I shouldn’t be anywhere near. He was always clear, that at any point I could walk away. That I could stop it.

“I know.” I say. “I want…” I bite my lip. “Can we go before someone sees us?”

He huffs glancing around. It’s an excuse and he knows it. No one else is here. That’s why we choose this spot to always meet. No one will see Rose Capulet getting into Roman Montague’s car time after time.

He puts the car into drive and I jolt back in the seat as we speed off.

We don’t say another word. Not one. The radio is the only sound between us and when we pull up to the motel, an hour out of the main city, we both sit there staring for a moment.

Roman gets out first, and ever the gentleman he walks around and opens my door. I hop out giving him my best, sunshine smile.

He pulls me back, pulls me into his arms and kisses me lightly. “I’ll never do anything you don’t want, you know that right?”

I nod. I want this. I know I do. I’m just nervous.

I fidget beside him as he collects the keys and we walk into a nondescript room. It’s not bad. It’s not dingy. It’s just impersonal. Standard white sheets, a generic picture screwed to the wall and a bland chair in the corner.

Roman glances at me before putting the bags on the side. He pulls out a bottle and I let a nervous giggle escape me.

“Champagne?” I tease.

He grins. “I want to do this right.” He says.

“And champagne makes it right does it?”

He shrugs. “I’d have laid rose petals but…”

“I prefer them on the stem.” I reply and he grins.

He pops the cork, pouring the drink out and I sip nervously, letting the bubbles fizz in my mouth. I feel like a child despite the fact that I’m twenty years of age. Roman puts his glass down by the bed and lays out on it.

I watch him for a moment then take the hint and lie down.

He doesn’t touch me. Doesn’t make a move to.

So it’s me who leans over, me who kisses him. His hands wrap around my hair and he pulls me tighter into him.

“Rose.” He murmurs.

I open my eyes staring into his. I can feel him beneath me. He’s hard. I’ve nothing to compare him to but Roman feels big, he looks big. I gulp as I realise that soon he’s going to be pushing that into me.

His hands start to undo his clothes. He unzips his hoody. Then his jeans.

I fumble with my top, unable to get it off despite choosing one that should be easy to remove and in the end he helps, easing it off my head. His eyes fall to my breasts. I bought a new lingerie set especially. I wanted to show him how ready I was.

“You’re so beautiful Rose.” He says cupping my cheek and kissing me.

I kiss him back. Hard. He pulls me on top of him and without realising it I’m grinding against him. He’s groaning, undoing my jeans and sliding them down before I register it.

His fingers skim over my back and then down under my thong and round to where I’m already drenched but, as he starts to touch me, I freeze.

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