Page 60 of Reckoning

“Sofia,”

“No,” I snap. I know what he’s going to say. I know what words are going to come out of his mouth and I won’t hear it. “I’m not doing it. You’ve all put yourself on the line.”

“What you’re doing is too risky.”

“I think I’ll be the judge of that.”

He huffs, grabbing my shoulders. “Stop letting your pride override your judgement.”

“I…”

“We’ve got enough, Sofia, you’ve given us enough. You don’t have to see him again. You never have to even talk to him again.”

I chew my lip. Is that even possible? Could I simply delete his number and that would be it? No, I’d bump into him, I’d come across him at the next ball, or the next political rally, or something. I can’t escape him. Even if I cut off all contact I would still have to occupy the same spaces he did.

My heart sinks as that realisation hits me.

Maybe I was stupid. Naïve. Maybe I didn’t think through the consequences thoroughly enough when I came up with this stupid scheme.

“I need to go.” I state unable to look him in the eye.

“Sofia, please…” Ben begins.

But I don’t listen to him. I know he’s right. Deep down I know it. But I have to see this through. I have to see this right to the end. The only way I win now is if Roman is successful. If we are successful.

* * *

It’s dark.Even as I open my eyes I can’t make out anything in the space I’m in but there’s a soft light coming from the doorway beyond.

I shift and I can feel the fabric against my bare legs. As my breathing increases I can feel I’m braless. That I’ve essentially been stripped and all I have on is a t-shirt. Only, it’s not mine.

And this bed, this bed is not mine.

The mattress is different. Not softer, not hard, just not mine. Besides, my sheets are silk. These sheets are brushed cotton.

I take a sharp inhale and that smell hits me. I know that smell. I’ve smelt it before but it’s not one of danger, at least not to me. Maybe I’ve gone mad and become delusional? Maybe I smacked my head too hard and I’m actually unconscious, lying in a hospital somewhere.

No, this is real. Thisisreal.

I move slowly, stretching out, just as a voice reaches my ears.

“Roman.”

His voice is just as deep as before but he sounds less gentle than when he’s speaking with me.

I can see him, shifting about beyond the room I’m in. His back is to me but I can see every muscle revealed by the tight top he has on as he holds the phone to his ear.

“No.” He says. “She’s here. She’s safe. That’s all that matters.”

I can hear my brother. I can hear his mumbled words in reply.

Koen growls. “How the fuck do I know that?”

I scrunch my hands into the duvet, wishing I could hear the other part of this conversation. Wishing I understood what the hell was going on.

“No.” Koen says. “What she needs is some space. I can give her that, I can…”

My brother cuts across him. He turns enough that I can see his face, I can see the scowl. Clearly whatever he’s saying is not to Koen’s liking.