Page 152 of Deliria

Death was never really something I’d thought about. Not something I’d considered. I’d never been one of those people concerned about my own mortality, but as I hold her to me, I know that this is the only way, that this is the logical thing to do.

I can’t live without her. I can’t go on without her. Can’t pretend that my life has any meaning or purpose when Scarlett was my purpose. Was my reason for existing.

Even if there is nothing after life. Even if I pull the trigger and the only thing that meets me is nothing, then it would still be worth it, still be the right call.

Because I can’t exist in a world where Scarlett doesn’t.

And I refuse to even try.

I take a deep breath, a calm resolute feeling replacing barely a fragment of my grief.

My finger finds the trigger, I place the barrel against my temple, holding Scarlett against my chest and as close to my heart as I physically can.

I promised Scarlett I would never leave her. I promised her that it was me and her, together.

And if this is what it takes, then so be it.

“I’m coming,” I murmur. “Hold on, Scarlett, I’m coming.”

The End

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