Someone he loved had died. Someone he loved enough that he didn’t want to survive without them. That must be what haunts him.
But then why would he be covered in blood with near-fatal injuries? Had he nearly died trying to save her and failed?
I couldn’t imagine the pain and guilt that must come from not being able to save the one you love. Giving your whole body and still failing in the end—a heart so broken it loses the will to live.
I also couldn’t help my mind as it strayed to thoughts of her.
What had she looked like? How had she died? How long had they been together? Was she his first love?
The questions kept coming, and I found myself jealous, yet grief-stricken, for the doomed lovers.
It hurt, thinking of them being together.
My thoughts were far away as Ven, Sabra, and I sat silently in the tall swaying grass, the star-strewn sky bright above us. I still marveled at how the stars managed to stay alight throughout the day, even though I recognized none of the constellations.
Back home it always gave me comfort to point out Orion, Cassiopeia, or Scorpius on the rare nights they were visible. To be able to clearly see and name something so far away and unreachable made me feel comforted. Alive. As if stretching myself to that distant point in space made me bigger and braver than I actually was.
Here the sky told me no such stories, and I felt more alone than ever.
* * *
We finally made our way down the slope and onto the training field. Sure enough, Dyani was there, her ponytail whipping behind her as she sparred a petite woman with a shaved head. Waiting for her to finish, I inspected the knives on a nearby rack. I grabbed one with a medium blade and short hilt and began warming up.
Dyani no doubt had a new way of humiliating me today, but I would at least come armed and prepared with what little I knew.
Finishing their practice, she spoke to her sparring partner with the softest expression I’d ever seen on her face. When she finally turned to face me, that gentle look hardened, and I immediately took the stance from yesterday, knowing there would be no pleasantries with this one.
If she was surprised to see me, she didn’t show it. She just dove straight into my lesson.
“When attacking your enemy, you want to use the force from your core, not your arm, and follow through. Like this.” Dyani kept her dominant arm close to her torso, then stepped forward and swiped her blade diagonally through the air while unwinding her body. She moved with such fierce swiftness that I could only hope to emulate her one day.
I mimicked her movement, repeating it several times with a few corrections before she barked, “Now attack me.”
I swiped as she’d shown me, but as soon as I completed my follow-through, Dyani jabbed at me. I took Rowen’s advice and watched as her loaded hip took direct aim at my exposed rib. Using my speed, I jumped back quickly, evading her assault that would have landed me in the dirt.
Shock spread across my face before morphing into a smile. I’d actually missed her attack!
Dyani’s already narrow eyes shrank to angry slits, and she charged at me so fast I couldn’t tell where she meant to strike. I barely blocked a vicious blow before she kicked my feet out from under me, and I fell on my back with a hollow thud. She couldn’t even give me a moment of victory before knocking me on my ass.
Dyani hovered over my supine form and gloated down at me.
I glared back. That was a cheap shot, and she knew it.
I wanted to knock that smug look off her face so badly that, before I could think to stop myself, I swiftly spun and kicked my leg out, hitting her right in the same sensitive area she’d hit me.
Dyani’s arms flailed as she fell to the ground and landed beside me with the same painful thud.
She stood so quickly it was as if she never fell, but she and I both knew she had, and that I was the one who caused it.
“I am done training you,” she practically spat at me, and I was left speechless on the ground.
“Seriously?” I asked in shock, rising up on my elbows.
“Dead serious. Find someone else to train your sloppy, ungrateful self. I’m done with you.” She stalked off furiously without another word.
I continued to sit on the ground, stupefied. I couldn’t believe I’d just ruined my opportunity of learning how to fight from someone so skilled.
I hauled myself off the ground, but it took me longer than it should have. My limbs were laden with exhaustion.