Page 124 of Falling Princess

Lorcan shuddered. I felt him hardening again beneath me. With deliberation bordering on shyness—which I now understand the source of—he moved lower, down the curve of my ass to my inner thighs. I opened, giving him room and permission, until his fingertips brushed against my sex through the barrier of my soaked panties. The contact reverberated through my entire body.

“Zosh...” he breathed into my shoulder.

“Please, Lorcan.” I pressed a soft kiss to his jaw. “Touch me.”

He hesitates. Not for lack of interest, that’s clear. I can practically see the battle playing out between his sense of honor and his desire. Wanting to please me and protect me at the same time, even from himself.

Still hesitant, he stroked the exterior of my underwear in a long, slow, firm glide. I exhaled harshly. It scorches through me, a live current of need.

“Fuck,” he whispered again, tracing the same path back up.Yes.He worked one fingertip under the edge of my underwear.Yes. More.Lorcan swallowed hard. “Zosia, I...”

“Don’t stop. Please.” I’m not above begging. If he stops, I’ll implode.

He chuckled, a tight, airless puff against my cheek. With a ragged inhale, he pressed upward in a slow glide.Oh, fuck, yes.A feral groan came from my mouth, though several seconds passed before I realized that I’m the one who made it.

“Zosia.” Lorcan whispered my name wonderingly, lightly tracing the wet folds of my sex. It’s lovely, so nice, but not quite what I want. Not enough.

I arched upward and reached down to press his finger deeper inside me. Sparks raced up my spine and exploded behind my eyes.

“Yes. Just like that. More,” I pleaded. Lorcan’s breath came in harsh, shallow pants. The sound he makes when he finds the way to stroke inside me almost breaks me.Yes.I couldn’t do anything but feel. My entire world is his body on mine, in me, all consciousness focused on the slow, wet glide of his rough fingers, in and out. I am so close to the edge and racing toward it with every heartbeat.

He did something with his wrist—turns it, changes the angle, I don’t know or, honestly, care—and it sent me flying into darkness. Fireworks behind my eyes. A pulse radiating outward through my core, so intense that it was almost too much and I had to push him away. I made noises; no words were involved.

I can’t tell whether I’m drowning or diving.

Lorcan released a breath as though he’d been holding it for ages.

“Princess. I—”

“Don’t you dare apologize.”

His mouth closed. Good.

“Quit calling me ‘Princess.’ My name is Zosia.”

I brushed back his hair from his face and took it between my hands, the way he did to me earlier.

“I love you. I love what we’re doing. If you say you regret it, I will never forgive you. If you don’t want to continue this, for any reason, fine. But please don’t ever tell me you wish it hadn’t happened.”

“Princess,” he said, half-rebuke, half-longing. “I could never regret it.”

One out of two isn’t terrible.

“Good. I can’t go into a wedding I don’t want without having some part of this for myself.”

Lorcan squeezed me tightly. “Zosia. That’s not going to happen. I don’t want you to feel forced into marrying anyone. I want you to choose me, on your terms. Not your father’s or anyone else’s. Yours. Or, if not me, then someone who loves you as much as I do. It should only be your choice. The when. The who. All of it.”

“Then, why won’t you have sex with me? I choose you. Now.”

Lorcan let go and shifted onto his back beside me, putting one arm behind his head. Pensive, but relaxed.

“Because you deserve better than a secretive fumbling on a college dorm bed with a mattress so thin you can feel the wood platform underneath.”

I couldn’t help but laugh. “They are bad, aren’t they?”

“They are.” He turned serious. “I can’t protect you if I’m distracted by...this. My sole purpose is to keep you from harm. If I miss the threat that takes you away from me forever, I couldn’t live with myself.”

He’s afraid of ending up like his father.

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