Page 79 of Married to Number 22
Her fingers wrap around mine. “I don’t blame you for keeping your distance, sweetheart.”
My eyes fly to hers, shock rippling through me. “You don’t?”
“With that family track record,” she says dryly, “it’s no wonder that you were a little gun shy.” She straightens, shakes her head. “I can almost see why your Grams felt like she needed to give you a push. Now is it the way I would have gone about it? No—” Her lips twitch. “Okay, fine.Iactually think it’s pretty brilliant. I definitely would have done something like that, especially if it meant that the granddaughter I loved would finally step off the sidelines of her life and start living.”
“I—”
But I can’t finish the sentence.
Because I think I finally might understand a bit about why Grams did what she did.
Trust the process, break the curse, and know I love you so, so much.
Maybe she truly didn’t believe in the Maybelle Curse.
Maybe she gave me this push so I wouldn’t end up alone.
Maybe…
The future I’ve dreamed of—the fantasy, the dashing hero, the happy ending—can actually be mine.
“Thank you,” I whisper, tucking those realizations close, the wound in my heart slightly smaller for the first time ever.
“For what?”
“For making it make sense.”
Expression gentling, she bumps her shoulder against mine. “Thank you for sharing this with me.” Another squeeze of her fingers. “For sharingallof it.”
“I have to admit”—the words just flow out of me, probably imprudently but also, I don’t have any hope of stopping their flow, not now that I’ve let this all come out—“I worried I might not know how to handle you and Carrie.”
Kathy laughs. “Why’s that?”
“Because you guys are so…” I was going to saymuch, but that’s rude, yet the delay of me searching for a word thatisn’trude (and coming up blank) has her laughing. “I’m used to Grams,” I blather, “but she wasn’t like you guys—your family is so close, and you all know so much about each other. And you’re so comfortable in yourselves. I don’t think Grams or I have ever had that.”
If Grams had, she wouldn’t have spent years pining away for a man who hurt her over and over again.
And I wouldn’t have spent far too long letting my father and brother walk all over me, wouldn’t have pushed Aiden away because I was scared we wouldn’t work out.
Only…he’s not away now, is he?
My heart flutters, but before I can truly sit in that thought, she’s speaking again, “You know the one rejoinder I’ve heard my whole life?”
I shake my head.
“That I’m always too loud, too brash, toomuch.” She shrugs. “Quiet down. Make yourself smaller. Fit in. Over and over again—” A sigh. “But eventually, as I got older, the words everyone kept telling me stopped meaning so much. I finally realized that I am who I am and…” Another shrug. “I’m not going to apologize for that any longer.”
Guilt wraps itself tightly around my heart. “I’m sorry.”
“For stating the truth?” She tucks a strand of my hair behind my ear. “Don’t be. It’s reminded me that while I am who I am, thatisa lot.” A tap to the tip of my nose. “So, it’s important to go slowly and say”—her mouth curves—“notforce fed my son’s new wife pastries until she’s ready to burst.”
I giggle. “For the record, they’re delicious so I wasn’t exactly complaining.”
“Because you were too full to get the words out?”
I giggle again. “Maybe.”
She touches my cheek, eyes going serious. “Want something else that’sfor the record?”
